light a fire in my chest
Melt away the frozen parts
My mind has been shivering for years
You bring this heat back to my spine
And I’ve been burning like gasoline
these past dreams of evenings

You entice me
Oh sweet divine
As if some nostalgia followed
An echo of past joy
The first tulips of spring
Aroma of a home cooked meal
These feelings rush my senses
My chest sprints to the finish
A marathon of a ribcage
And a greenhouse in my throat
Ready to bloom with words only
instincts can describe

She'll worry until the end of days that she'll initiate dismay

Into your soul

Causing you to think twice

About being with her

But you must squash her qualms with herself

And be there for her when she's down, lift her up and carry her through the fire like she's always wanted.

Make her smile on the day she can't take it anymore, remember her favorite indie band, remembering the smallest stories she doesn't even remember

Picking up habits her father once had that she greatly admires, helping her with the tires

Opening the doors for her, making her a priority

Letting her get more of the physical pleasure

Trying new ways to make her see the stars in the ceiling

Always caring about what she's feeling

She'll get mad when those girls flirt with you, but prove her with your actions

That her insecurity is all in her head.

I’ll hold you like a memory
Hometowns between sheets
Make midnight forever
Like winter is always
Make love like jazz
Play trumpets with dreams

To do the impossible,
Something so hard to let go..
Reaching your potential
And searching for
Forgiveness.

Catholics.
The outcast Christians.

Have you ever met the right person at the wrong time?
Me too...
He was the best thing that has ever happened to me..
We were perfect for each other but i wasn't ready.

I was 16, he was 18 we had known eachother for a couple of years, he was tall and he smelled nice.
He had blue eyes and dark brown hair.

He was a ****** up kid.
He had just gotten his drivers license, so he raced.
He got drunk om school nights.
He smoked one pack a day.

But when i was in his car he drove below the speed limit, because he knew i had anxiety.
He stopped the drinking cause he knew i didn't like it and he stopped smoking cause he didn't wanna make my asthma worse.

He became a nice guy, doing everything he could to make me feel like a princess...
When we had been together for 5 months he dropped out of school..
I got dissappointed and he promised he would get a job and get his **** together, but he was busy caring for me.

He wanted to get married.
He was about to turn 19 and his friends started to get married and have kids.. and he wanted that too...
But i wasn't ready...
I was 16 and just started high school...  i wasn't ready to even imagine myself starting a family yet..

So after 9 months i ended it.. with a text... i had to breathe... i needed space..
But i know that if i had met him 5 years later i would have spent the rest of my life with him..
We had the same values, we agreed on everything, rarely faught, had the same view on kids..
But i wasn't ready...
So i ended it with a text...

If you could see how many untitled drafts I have,
What would you think?
Shall I count them for you?
Upwards of twenty,
unfinished thoughts
and half formed metaphors,
poems where I just couldn't
find the words at the moment.