it was timeless
my love, my nights awake—
how i loved every inch of her
how my thoughts started and ended with her

it was scary
loving so much you feel vulnerable
feeling warmth from each kiss you don't ever want it to stop
how her i love you's made me happy

it was painful
how we ended things weirdly
how i still want you and yet can't
how moving on seems so surreal

it was memories
that some nights those feelings creep up—
how i wonder what you are doing and who do you love now
thinking what if we never left each other
it was genuine love and still is

all you gave me was pain
that made me insane
after all that I was inhumane
asking myself what remains
it's passes through me from my veins
to you, you must be entertained
in your eyes i'm underpowered—
thinking i've been devoured—
waiting for me to reply
to give up all my efforts or at least try
to beg you to let me die

that one song
with melodies so surreal
that lifts my soul to another plane
with marmalade skies and
unfazed beautiful sunsets—
where your thoughts are clear
and the noise is simply cancelled and
my heart stays stable and at ease
where my worries vanish as it plays
with that one song

i am somewhere alone
dark, hollow and silent
with voices echoing from a distance
with eyes lurking in darkness
i am somewhere without walls
where there are no words
just a pitch black void
with nothingness emanating
with demons that can't be seen
i am somewhere where there's no help
no miracles, no messiahs
where when your eyes close there's no difference
where your thoughts are louder than your breath
i am somewhere lost in darkness
lost in indecisiveness, regrets and confusion—
trapped in vague words and unrepentant feelings
but amongst all that i feel save

I don't know what real love looks like
maybe it’s what we read in books—
or what we see in movies
and just maybe it’s your eyes
or whether what i feel for you is
love or infatuation
and if it's infatuation
let it enough to make you happy—
to make you smile day after day—
to keep you warm in the dark.
if it's infatuation
let it be with me day and night
from dusk till dawn
so i never get to hurt you
because i think love—
real love involves pain
and I never want to hurt you.

-Vibeactivist

as the song plays in the background
as the moon shines on our adolescent love
and as the stars shimmer in jealousy
i see you for who you are
I see you for the imperfections that makes you, you
as you smile, as i stare lovingly at you
and how you make my world radiate—
you were the nothingness that gave my life spark
the light at the end of the tunnel
most of all, you are my past, present and future