Inherited family curses.
Selling my soul,
away to
earn entrance into the womb.

Months of sleepless nights.
For my Mother as she tossed & turned
in agonizing pain.

All for her little Demon.

Done crawled out
6 days late and backwards.

Vomiting tar,
screaming curses.

Some mistakes are better left
unspoken, unseen and unheard.

I was born
under a starless sky.

Darkness is all,
I know.

Until I can
spread my decayed,
skeleton wings
&
descend down.

To the City of Fire.

I will be all black,
nothing more.

Death.
Sorrow.
&
Despair.  

Oh Father,
would be proud.

4 a.m
watering the flowers.
Cry or cringe.
I'm crying my way out of this.
When used properly
Pretty boy tears work
like liquid magic.

Free flowing
pity rivers
flowing.
Cheek to cheek,

Then the well ran dry.
&
No more ***** were given.

Life's like
a
twelve step program
of **** eating.

Then you get to wash
it all down
with punch
&  then you,
die.

Love is just a pigment
of a colour
we can never get in our hair.
No matter how many times we try
dying it.

You should have just gotten the abortion.
Wudda made this a whole lot easier.

Trading in my
used, old day dreams.
At the
dream crusher's junk yard.

I think.
I am just ready to start over.

& So the crawling caterpillar
crawled back into his cocoon.

To sit-sulk-suffer.

Until he grew, big enough to break the walls
risen before him.
And exit his self-perfecting prison.
One wing at a time.

Stab my back,
watch me bleed
lightening and scream "revenge".

I see myself as something.....
Greater than myself.
By the power invested in me,
I declare myself, god.

Now pull the trigger,
*****.
Or I'll drink punch & die.

I want to see,
the guy with
the
:) eyes
again.

Down under the Devil's balcony.
We'll be on fire.
Together.
Here's to dancing,
in my guilty inferno.

For an Angel,
you're pretty. Hot.

If I didn't live in such
a
small town.
I'd be a really big ****.

In these times,
I am.
Unsure of what
I see.

& If
my eyes,
have not betrayed
my heart.

I will, only know you..

As a
monster,
Medusa.

Is your snake hungry?

Trapped again,
once more I've been
tucked in so tight.

I've caught myself
slowly suffocating in between
your silky ***-sheets.

Baby, just
pressure me into
putting out.
One more time.

Sing,
me another
one
of your,
lovely lullaby lies.

Put me to sleep
&
turn off my night light.
Or,
whatever, you do.

But when you're finished,
take whatever's left
of me.
And cast it
down into the darkness.

My body wants
to get back
with my soul.

We sing the songs
we write
in our own choirs.

Faces of gods.
Bodies of goddesses.
&
Voices of angels.

We're all missing property
of Heaven.

Until we die.
&
Rise above this.

Devil's downstairs
at the neighbors
lil'
hole in the wall.

We're just sitting
ducks
in a government funded
housing pond.

& I'm too afraid
to sleep.
In my own slum.

Thank you, for ruining my life.

Lost at
sea,
all the broken home kids
sail far, far away.
Too.

Making up  
memories.
Cause the real ones are better left
unsaid.

I just want someone,
to grab my hand & tell me,
I'm beautiful.

We all need a reminder
of our value.
Every now and then.
Feeling worthless is a popular trend.

A day in the life
trapped in
an hour glass.

Waiting
and
fading,
away with a
sand storm's
breathe.

Time doesn't exist,
I'll always be here.

Waiting.
Howling,
at the half-moon for you,
Babe.

Until, I'm starry-eyed & home again.

**** this,
**** that,
*******
and every ******* lie.

That slid through your
crooked/cracked teeth.

My fists,
consumed with an
angry adrenaline.

Knock out em' out.
You're going to need
an oral surgeon.
Next line you drop.
And Pow.

Talk ****,
get hit.
No, get electrocuted.

A night on the town.
Tonight,
you'll dine in hell.

With
Lucy & her court of Demons.

We have our
famous, lethal
arsenic brimstone martini
on special, Tonight.
.
Oh High, I'm Bandit,
I'll be serving you,
to the Beast this evening.

You're a real
****.
Let's just
straighten
you out.

Grab a
hammer
and pound
some sense
into your
hollow-wood-head.  

No,
I'm not giving you any.

Go ****, yourself.

Just playing
the hand
you dealt me.

Call me out.
Bluffin'.
Maybe I am.

But what's
the big deal?
When every-body-else is
full of **** too?

Listening to the
uncensored
lyric lies.

Getting lost.
in a mother *******
*******-haze or
web.

Uh,
whatever,
you say.

Just leave me
be.

& No
the colourful *****, you're
shovin' down my throat.

Isn't making me like you
anymore than I already
don't.

We tried,
so hard.

Only
to
fail
harder,
than I ever thought
we
would have.

Romantic fantasies.
Pine box nightmares.
&
My brains,
scattered across the ***** floor.

Covered in y-our blood.


It's everywhere.

Tragedy, was your last name.
******, was your first name.

&
I played the part of Victim.
Very well.

Did you get a *******, when you heard me scream.
As you dug the knife into my back
over
&
over
&
over again.


I'll see you in hell.

For every
condescending syllable,
that has slipped out of
your.
Serpent like tongue.

Wish I could
squash you with my
black leather boots
&
watch you squirm.
&
Gasp for air.

Like I have done,
so many times before
your black-hole-eyes.

But, that wouldn't be the Christian thing to do.

Good thing. I got excommunicated.

Now, suffer.

The Goods kick it
on Easy Street.

One day,
I'll be a little less
broken.
Some day,
we'll be a little,
closer.

There's a calm before the storm.

But Katrina, never gave fair warning.

Be prepared.

Cause
it
will
rain
until
all the angels
feel a lil' bit
better.

She misses
me
too.

</3

And I swore,
I'd never
fall
in
love
again.

And,
I kept my part of the deal.

Fell all the way
down to my knees,
in hell.
Following through.

Only to forcefully give up
66 hand jobs.
To 6 different beasts.

Look, who's burning now?

Your spark.
Lit me like a match.
Left me to burn
like a witch on a stick.

I'm very well-done.

Oh. High, I'm Bandit.

Sit-slit-slip-away
into
the sunset.

Frozen in the feeling
of "time" ending,
in it's own way.

But yours,
is just another
crack in the mirror.

Alas, 7 more years.
Then you'll be.

Freedom forever.
&
Youth eternal.

Welcome, 2 the cult.

Wish,
you loved
me like,
I thought you did.

Should've
blown my brains out.

When all these
crazy thoughts
started singing
in my mind.

If I was in the right place.
I would have,
but I didn't.

Now.I.Suffer.

Thanks, for the stab in the back.
See you in the great below.

</3

Boy,

She's
got you
all *******
again.

Just.
Bound.
Once more.

To her
infernal-eternal,
heart breaking
beauty.

Witch, she possesses.
you,
to play the pawn
in her *****'s game.

Like a champ.

But will you really be winning?

When you find all-o-those,
***** little secrets.

She has hidden in her black-lace-*******.

Regret,
sorrow
&
despair.

This is all life,
seems
to give.

So why
should we
care?

Drink.
Dream.
Do.

Whatever it takes to get you through this.
Or take a bullet in the brain,
with a big ******' smile.
:)

Fire
burns in hell.
Too.

All
dragged down
down
d
o
w
n
to the bottom
of the abyss.

Guess I'll just start....

Drinking,
dollar store
love potions.

Only to get a stomach ache.

Those **** butterflies.
They've done it again.

.

Trust fund
kids
******* up
all of
Daddy's
liq-liq-liquor.

I hope you
choke
on your
trust fund checks.

&
Die in his wallet.

Forever, parasitic.

When everything
is said and
done.

Gone
Faded.
Jaded.
Decayed.
Dead.  
Wish.
I was.

Just remember,
I didn't chose to
be brought into this.

You just forced me through the
crack-hole.
&
Yanked me out nine months later.

Sometimes, I hate both of you for this.

He asked me if....
"It hurt, when I fell from Heaven".

I replied with a quick.
" It was painless
until my face
cracked open
on the bottom...
Of the brimstone
under-world.
They call me Fallen Angel, down there."

jkiddy.

Buried alive, beneath the rhetorical lies.
Of a thousand broken-prayer beads.

Surrounded by all of my....
False hopes.
Fake friends.
&
Some, hornet priests
who are exorcising their own demons.
On a ******* fueled ****** of sadism in it's own right.

On the dark side of the confession booth. This is nothing.

But a divine
waste of my time.
I'll see you all, in Hell.

Throwing down my towel.

To lay,
on top.

Of the
mausoleum...

So I can,
work.

On my tan.

Hating every second of it.
Sulking in the sunlight.

Cause
I'd
rather
be with you.

In
the
shade.

Oh Baby, you've done.

Captured my essence
and made me think
that
I
exist.

For a
slit-wrist second
in "time".

Until them sparks
make fire.
& take you up in his flames.

A bad dream.
Filmed right between my
starry-eyes.

Soul Photography,
uhhhh
Flashbacks of missin' you.

Until then,
I will be all black
& nothing more.

Than a wannabe-writer in the
mourning.
And a secret-screamer at night.

Giving up,
giving in
& going down
hard.

On the gas.

Oh you know,
not giving a ****
&
flying down the free way.
Like a bad *****.

Till I crash
back
into your arms.

The race is over.

Murdering murderers
done gone
melancholy
in the moonlight.
It's midnight.
The perfect time
to commit a crime.

Here's to premeditated drug dealing.
And everything else that can get me
a one way ticket.
To the Devil's bed-room.

I'm a lil'
annoying canary.

Chirp-chirp-chirping
out
the chatter.

Coming from the cat,
sitting on
your other shoulder.

Buried beneath
a broken home.
Day dreaming
of ****
that's long gone
down,
down,
down
to the darkest ditch.

I miss you.

Hell just isn't any fun, when the Devil's not at home.

I'm looking up at
nothing
but a black cloudy sky.

Guess, we better grab
our umbrellas.
&
Rock our rain coats.

It's going to rain......

Torrential, tear-storms
until the Angels below us
feel a little higher.

</3
</3
</3

&
Each slow-alone-second
will bring me closer,
to the darkness.

Closer to the sun.
Closer, to my roots.
Or to something. Good.

&
When it sets.
I too, will blend
with the darkness.

&
****, will look
a
little better.

While I'm still here
screaming,
"someone save me from myself".

As I keep on run-run-running
a blood-red black.
Race-line, to the finish.
To hallways that need sounds.

In homes.
That you have had
to have been in at least,
once before.

Till, the next time.
I'm be swimmin'
until I can lie
about this,
no more.

But I think.
That the last line,
will
hurt
the most.
</3

Sick-sick-sick.
&
I'm staring
all starry-eyed
at my body.

From across the bathroom floor,
dissipating.

Disappearing into
the thick-thick
forget-me- not
fog.

Lost in looks
I use to call my own.
But now my conscious is looking
at my-itself in the mirror.

I see shadows.
Stalk-sulk-lurking,
behind me.
Too.

I'm just trying to
shed some light on the
situation.

So,
maybe,
they'll just leave me alone.

& we'll
just live,
the Adam's Family
dream-life.

In our
big-black-brick-death-mansion.
<3
Humbled & hardened
by times & all of her troubles.

Spiked with agony.
Splashed with misery.
But I'll love every minute,
of my
dark/******/serene,
day-dream.

You'll be,
Morticia.
&
I'll play Gomez.

No pun intended.
But after-all
aren't we just the replications
of sorrow from a beautiful sight?

Well......

Here's to the
blackest roses
with
the sharpest thorns.

That're long-lost
& lonely
in the dark part of the forest.

Now,
drink the punch
&
die.

Hello, "Hero" Dr.'s.

Are you having
fun;
handing out ****** hidden,
in little,
tiny pills?

Prescription.
Addiction.

Swimming in the fog.
Until it finally
swallows
you up.
&
Spits, you out dead.


Welcome, to the real-world.
**** gets better.

<3

In the moment.
In the money.

Cash speaks for itself.
If you have enough of it.

One gun, $600.
A round of bullets. $6.
Knowing that you have
a six-shot round.

&
enough money,
to get you
out of any kind of legal troubles.
Priceless.

Choose Visa.
Killah, it's your vice.

My eyes, will rain
tear-drops
of tequila.
When I think
about you too.

They'll run down my
dead-white,-
porcelain-poltergeist
cheeks.
To the crack,
tip of my
toilet-talk-tongue.

It should just be bitten off
& Bleeding, by itself.

Darling, you haven't been the same since you switched your scripts.

Baby,
Our hearts are soon to
be
hollowed out & holey.
Half-way gone.
Half-way to the moon-hearts.
This is not permanent but we're forever.

But the moon was full the night before.
So it has been nothing but fading with the sorrow.
&
Darling, I'll be howling at the half moon for you.
</3

All in all
withdrawal,
was wonderful.

**** always work
itself out of the worse
& into the better <3.

Only if you can.

***** up.
Let go. &
Rage, like a wild ****....

For a couple of weeks.
I wuzza
Witch in withdrawal.

Until the haus,
came to get me
from the West.

Your common sense.....

Yeah, it
knows no logic.

Guess,
I'm just talkin' to a big,
boring brick-wall.
Again.

I'd rather be talking to myself, honestly.

I'm not
Surprised,
no-no-no-no

Disappointed?
You betchya.

But what can one expect.

When we live inside
one giant
circular-cynical-cycle.

Oh High,
I'm Bandit.

& I'd like to
Thank you,
for paying me lip service.

I'm forever in (your) debt.

Going out,
getting good.

All gothed-out,
glamorous.

Drop-dead.
Gore-geoous.

It's a curse.
Only
the truly beautiful at <3,
have it.

Talent.

Get it.
Dig it.
Dug it.

GOOD :)

I am just every drop of blood
the razor blades
made
me.

Drag downers
dragging themselves along
the skin surface
of my blood-flow
free way.
Wrists.

While,
I am screaming.
"I hate you" .

At the top of my black-tar
******
coated-codine lungs.

Yogurrrrr?
Help a ***** out.
&
go check on that crack pipe.
Uhhh.
I mean check the pipe for crack.

Cuz dem smokey rocks
make a bruthah go
cray-cray.

Welcome to the Goth Opera.
I'm just playing pretend,
anti-christ tonight.

Just show no fear.

Never cry.
Never love
Never die.

Liars live lies
for ever.

Yellow eyed wolves
with
sharp-pearly whites.

Are lusting after you.

But they just want to ,
paint their teeth.

With your,
blood-red-dead.

Sheepy

sheep

sheople

carcass.....

You are a
big, blue ocean
deep with thought
& wide with worry.

As you lay beside me
shaking from the shake down
of a cold wind’s breath.

I begin to laugh for,
I'm the next hurricane.
Who will rage a storm
across your waters.

I'm badder than Katrina,
& you best be
bowing both heads down,
***** Boy.

Before you
start, talking to me.

That's just how you do.
When youz in the presence
of  bad *****.

Well ****.
It's like I fell into this web.
A ****** and crawled out of it
a ****.
Funny how things go.

Let's flip this table.
Lemme just flip you off real quick.  
Cause this time,
I'll be walking right
out
the web.

Walking all over your little
E-Go
punch yourself in the ****.
Maybe,
you can feel something real.
For once.

lol.

You can't fool
me anymore.
I invented twank trickery.
*****, you can just call me
Bandit now.

& Oh,
my frost bitten
lungs,
lose their breath.
In all of your
nostalgic air.

It's a scary/cut/throat
feeling on a cool,
November morning.

But I swear to you,
have never seemed so clear
to me.

Maybe, I'm just
day-dream-dream-dreaming
again.

But I swear,
the frost clouds of cigarette
smoke you blew in my face,
Yesterday.
Looked just like a flock of
upside down <3's.

Just some
secret-smoke-signals
from across the state.

If you were here
&
they were gone.

Someday,
that's a wonderful
thought.