Deep asleep my heart stops beating
I see a chance to break away.
Looking down at myself not breathing,
I feel no sorrow if it ends today.
What’s the point in senseless silence,
in my silence can you hear me pray.
Love like magic is an illusion of science,
as I march into the dark decay.

Fear and darkness in the tears I bleed
as I drift into a permanent sleep.
Like a moth to the flame with burning wings
I fly to the valley of sorrow and grief.
I fall into the mouth of a broken tree
then land on the ledge of a snow-covered leaf.
I heard a voice bellow from below:

Where’s the justice in a land of liars,
a knife is plunged into the innocent soul.
A broken heart bleeds anger and fire
as the pendulum swings, the heart grows cold.

Why am I here this is a terrible mistake,
last thing I remember there was no pain,
I went to sleep but did I wake?
I do remember a porcelain plate,
a porcelain cup, I ate and drank,
was it dinner that night that sealed my fate?
Amatoxin tea with a ricin cake,
what have I done, what did I take?

Sorrow is a shadow over those who are grieving,
begging for a chance to put an end to the pain.
Writhing and thrashing from the venomous stings.
falling in darkness consumed by the flames.
As we suffocate should we fight to keep breathing,
or surrender to sorrow and the dark decay.

"Monday morning, oh no, not again,
Still 5 days of school until the week-end",
That's what I hear every now and then,
And I'm the only one who doesn't complain
Because I know that today, and tomorrow,
And every day of the whole week,
I'll see your face, your smile, and also
I'll hear your laugh that makes me go weak.
And my friends tell me all the time
That it's weird for me to feel attracted to you,
Because well, you're different that anyone
You're not like the others, that is true.
You don't look like the girls I dated before,
You have nothing in common with them
But on wednesdays, when I walk through the door,
I feel the love I lost coming back up again.
That's what I like about you, as you can see
I forget about my problems and my broken heart,
I just like you being close to me,
I always look for you when we're apart.
But... This feels like something forbidden,
This king of thing never happened to me,
It's scaring me and I'm like frozen.
Is this... Am I... ? No, I can't be...

I fear the day I'll have to admit it,
But being with you makes my mind jump with joy.
I think I like you, maybe a tiny bit..
My God, save me, I'm in love with a boy.

a large room,

no, a really,

unimaginably

large room,

with a typewriter

in the center

-

the words

“free yourself”

are already spoken,

and underlined,

in the center

of the page

-

there is no blinking cursor,

no glowing white field

-

an iron sight

holds the paper down

so you can

torture or nurture

or shun or ****** it

with both

precision and accuracy

-

careful though,

you can drift

beyond the walls of your

supposedly

big room

in the length of a page

i walk

brain dragging

behind me

(a suitcase)


this is what i have

this is what i know

this is what i am


did i leave my oven on?

will my apartment

(along with my neighbors)

be spent cinders

when i return?


a line of yellow tape

a shyly raised hand


this is all i have

this is all i know

this is all i am


(forgetful)

(stupid)

(out of room)

(out of time)

(out of spite)

(out of rhyme)


poor

dependent

rummaging through my suitcase

on the sidewalk

for my key


(if it’s yours

you have to prove it)

this really is all my


(fault)

(problem)

loss


pushing past my

belongings

looking beneath my

self

i find the only thing

i ever really had

in a place where it can never be turned to ashes


i am all i have

i am all i know

i am all i am


seeing it safe

slightly scuffed but still intact

(contrary to cruel conveyancing)

i wrap my heart in a dying thought

building a fortress of drying observation

around a charred husk

of burnt-out hope


applying it firmly

between clenched teeth

(edging out gravity with pressure)

behind zipped lips


still, i walk

brain dragging

behind me

(a suitcase)