Each day I wake up and I'm smiling
Because I'm one day closer to finally dying
Life isn't so hard if you stop trying
Look happy baby, no one cares if you're crying
I light my cigarette and I take a deep breath
With smoke in my lungs I can finally rest
They tell me it'll **** me, ask me if its worth it
I tell them if it does that would be perfect
I'm tired of living always looking down
Picking pieces of myself up off the ground
I knew a man who finally got out
Of this world made of agony, that's all it's about
A handful of pills and he floated away
Left me in hell to live another day
I told him that without him I wouldn't survive
Yet somehow each morning I wake up alive
It isn't fair that he left me out here alone
Just a few months befor he was meant to come home
Home where he finally would've been okay
It's a shame his own demons came to take him away
I begged him to stay
He couldn't take it one more day
If it hurts it helps
More than anything else
Another cut another bruise another burn
I'm a hypocrite that will never learn
Pushing ideas on everyone else
Begging them to live when I can't convince myself
So I'll keep breathing even when it hurts
Going on with the knowledge that it only gets worse
Just remember that you're living a lie
Life is **** and then you ******* die
*The Suicide Diaries