I see him in class, Monday through Friday
We talk, not in person of coarse
Maybe it’s for the best
I’m only in High School

We see each other in the hall
A smile is all we give
A small unnoticeable smile that you only see if you’re looking
Maybe it’s for the best
I’m only in High School

He glances at me
I see it out of the corner of my eye
That’s all we get
Maybe it’s for the best
I’m only in High School

I like him a lot
He makes my heart skip a beat
He likes me
Maybe that’s not for the best
I’m only in High School

I’m in High school
This is fact
I like him
He likes me
Why?
I’m only in High School

People say this is the time to live
I say this is the time to love
Maybe I’m wrong
I’m only in High School

Year after year
Day after day
The grief is still the same
It didn’t get better
It didn’t become okay
It swallowed me whole
Refusing to let me go
I shed a tear for everyday without you
The tears are endless like the heartbreak
Days pass and suddenly I’m back to that horrid day
I’m not allowed to shut everyone out for that day
My family refuses to let me
Funny how we all lost you
And yet they still fight me on grieving for the day
But I know you’d smack me upside the head
And ask me why I’m crying
I know you’re at ease and happy
But what I would give for another night on the front porch swing
A night I didn’t know at the time but would become one of the many memories I now hold onto like my life depends on it
But I know it doesn’t
But your memory does
And I use your memory as my life support
I miss you Grandpa
I love you Grandpa
I wish I told you that more often when you were still here

Lately
I don’t feel close
to poetry.

It feels elusive.
Unfamiliar.
Once it spoke to me.
But now it’s mute.

It sits back
and doesn’t look
at me.

If I call out
it doesn’t hear.

Lately poetry is
like that demon
I used to want
to reappear.