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Lord Aconite Jun 15
"I killed someone"
I cried
The Dreamer
The Wanderer
The one whose imagination
Rivals that of the Gods
I never meant to
I just wanted more control
Being a dreamer as it downsides
Determined to be disciplined
I trained
But in reality
I was killing my creativity
It happened so suddenly
Is what I tell myself
But I felt her dieing
Saw all the warnings
But I never fought for her
I watched as she slipped away
Tears stained her flawless face
"I forgive you"
She uttered
At that moment
Something died within me
Irreplaceable,
It can never be revived
My Muse is forever dead
And I eternally locked from it domain
Someone new took it's place
Lord Aconite Jun 15
My Calamity,
An ever shifting beauty
Esoteric and unnatural in it being,
Like a taste you can't taste,
So foreign none of my senses perceive her.
She.....She.......
She evades any explanation I could give,
A limitation on her.
She—
A blank canvas,
Touched and formed by an Old soul—
A certain Confessional poet
Who filled her with more truth
Than there is in the Bible.
Raw, Unbridled, Mind boggling
I know I won't survive her,
Yet........Yet
My heart aches to see it all,
To know,
Not to change, but to understand,
To love, to hate, to fight, to reconcile.
It my calamity and I,
Versus
The truth.
I think I'm in love.....
Lord Aconite Jun 15
My bane, the unseen—
The part of me
I never want to meet.
You grew in silence,
A writhing mass of shadow,
Born from loneliness
And self-defeat.

Oh, how I hate you.
But I can’t.
Because hating you
Means hating me.
You’re the sum
Of all my wrong turns—
And still,
I run back to you.
Because in the end,
Only you
See the real me.

The world outside is a jungle.
They walk on two legs,
But bite with their words.
You became my cage.
And though the key is in my hand,
I hold it like a blade.
I want to break you
For the pain you bring—
But you’re also
My only comfort.

I locked you away.
Still, I run to you.
Banging and banging
On the walls I built—
Trapped between black and white,
Running from both,
Neither offering understanding.

So here I am—
Your jailer.
Your only friend.
Your enemy.

And I wonder,
After all this…
Do you care for me?
😵‍💫😵‍💫
Lord Aconite Jun 15
I fought.
Every second of my life
Etched in pain.
I faced it.
I won.
It changed me.
I learned.

I unlearned the so-called truths,
Every sacred teaching
Of life.
And relearned it myself—
From the best teacher:
Life.

She taught me all.
My favorite woman.
Whether pain or pleasure,
I loved her just the same.
She whispered secrets
Of existence, society, and everything in between.

Many times, I nearly died.
But I survived.

Then came sin—
My chosen curriculum.

I built my deadliest sins
And wore them like armor:
My vanity rivals even God's.
I cannot fail. It's impossible!

My greed keeps me sharp,
Focused, burning.
I want what I want.

My lust—
Not only for ***,
But for victory.
To see this world
Brought to its knees.

A cosmic hunger.

My gluttony?
It drives me to take on
More than I should—
And still, I surpass.

My apathy—
That cold, uncaring monster—
Is my shield.
A necessary evil.

Everything else is obsolete.
Even virtue.

If you plan to survive in this world:
Abandon all virtues.
There is no God above.

You are God.
We are Gods.

Do not let the devil of *******
Use society's illusion of order
To chain your will
And drain your soul.

You are a creature of change.
Change is chaos.
Chaos is life.
Life is God.
God is me.
I am you.
You are us.

Heed this message:
Survival is not the goal.
Possession is not the goal.
Happiness is not the goal.

Chaos is.

The only permanent truth
Is impermanence.

So go.
Unleash the world.
Restore it to its natural order—
CHAOS!
Wow, it been a while, writers block had me chained to emptiness. But I'm back now!
Lord Aconite May 9
What's there to say?
I sit here waiting,
Waiting for something.
A thing that doesn't know it way
Or maybe it's me who doesn't.
Hopeless, Restless,
I stay,
For that one day,
That everything will be better.
But I know
Nothing changes, if nothing changes.
Nothing will change if we don't change.
Lord Aconite May 7
My Angel, My Muse
A monument to my life
My inspiration
😮‍💨😮‍💨
Lord Aconite May 6
Here it comes again
The maelstrom of thought that kills
The corroding energy that eats
All it does is take
I hate it
And yet I let it in so easily
Without fuss nor fight
I let it take control
Driving me straight to its signature domain
An empty space of despair
I can't escape here
I hate it here
And yet I sit and watch as it pullover
Dragging me right to the thick of it
Do I like it here?
If yes what those that make me?
A *******?
A soldier?
A survival?
A man?
Nah it definitely not that
And yet I watch
It manifesto slowly converting my memory
Good is bad and bad is bad
It spread and spread
Always taking
And yet I watch
It as it all now
there nothing left
And yet I don't move
Fight! Fight!
A whisper, it's fading
But I don't respond
It continues, and yet I didn't
Weak, it watches with me
Without judgement or hatred

"What happened? Where did it all go? Who...who are we"

It questions, the only sound in this tar of Tartarus
But I only have one answer

"I'm tired"
🙃🙃
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