he is a warm sun on a lifetime of cloudy days,
I cover up to keep the cold out but he undresses my thoughts
he says he loves me
and i cant breathe,
i wonder if he knows that,
this act of kindness could near **** **** me,
he kisses me slowly like he's okay with waiting,
and he is tap tap tapping on my door
like we could be more
and we could be more
but he doesn't know i am breaking
the pieces of my heart lay broken
like broken pottery with too many missing pcs to put back together,
I tell him you love the idea of me,
a warm body to warm the sheets next to,
a hand to hold,
someone to look for in a crowd,
a person to belong to
that lust looks like love
until you get sick or hit with hardships,
he says it though,
over and over,
I am tempted to believe him,
why don't i believe him?
as he looks into my eyes
and tells me the wonders of this body
that's changing
and becoming more like my home
he says he loves me,
holding me tight,
maybe he thinks its true,
maybe he means to manipulate,
maybe in the heat of a kiss given right,
he believes it,
i dont deny the body its wants ,
but i will judge this heart,
i map out intention ,
as I link love with his name,
practice perfection,
when he loves me just the same,
he says : i believe that its true.
i think that his beliefs are founded in his body and i cant allow myself that.
i say : if i fell in love with you, you aren't in the place to catch me if i fall.
and thats the nature of this body to fall hard.