Fabric held between fragile fingers, closed eyes. Faded fabric, Her sweater dripping with watery despair. Suddenly, a violent wave of Her scent brings you to your knees, leaves you gasping for air, the Hole in your Heart burning, blistering and raw. She is so near, so close. Your ribs ache, your lungs cry out, no longer able to withstand the magnitude of your Grief.

Mournful, choking sobs, ones that leave cracks in your Bones, holes in your Skin. Until strong arms grab your shaking shoulders, a soft hand reaches over and gently wipes your Tears. It is warmer, so much warmer, and the air is lighter, as She takes your hand in Hers.

You hold Her tight, tighter than ever before, burying your face in Her shoulder, softly whispering words of Sorrow, Regret; words of Love and Reconciliation. How much you have missed Her, how empty you have been. She nods, She knows, for She too, has felt such pain. She too, has been lost among the loneliness.  

You let Her arms embrace you, Her laughter fills your ears, your heart. Because with Her beside you, Her arms around you, you can feel the shattered pieces start to re-align.

And for the first time since that cold September morning,

You can breathe again.

Tenebrous days in which it feels as though you will never be happy again; nothing is wrong, but nothing is right. You spend all day switching between uncontrollable crying and complete and utter emotional numbness, feeling stuck in time, as though everything is moving in slow motion. For you are trapped underwater, and all of your energy is put into just keeping your head afloat above the murky water.

Black ink running though your veins, coughing for air, you fear the darkness inside you is contagious. Slowly sinking, ears ringing, muscles aching, bloodshot eyes, your head throbbing every time you blink.

You watch the light dance across the room as the days fade into dusk, closing your eyes, and letting the shadows cover you like a blanket. And you beg, you plead, you pray, that the next breath you take will be your last.