Rereading old writes
The familiar heartache,
unending pain, the paradox,
the ****** and contradiction
I must be trying so hard
to tell myself something
but I never learn
Reopening old wounds
Touching nerves,
the skin burns, the watering eyes,
the fights and the lies
Cutting ties and goodbyes
The drunk ***, the sent texts
So many regrets and so much stress
A sad read, a happy memory
A lifetime of love and irrelevant stuff
What am I doing?
Questions, no answer
long walks in parks after dark
with nothing but a pen in my hand
and heart in my throat,
quick sand and so much smoke
.
I don't feel I just shake and shiver.
I wished that I wrote you a poem
so here it is, the final piece of me
that I'm prepared to give
.
"The sting, the grief of love lost"
"the hardest part is that
I know it's just growing pains"
"I miss being able to see faces"
"why do things get complicated
in the search for simplicity?"
"we find solace in companionship
we are not solitary creatures
we are man and woman"
"You're fine, son."
"Let me be
Your barely living proof
That happiness
Is hard to find
Just don't ask me why"
"I was so busy trying to live I must have forgotten to breathe"
"I'm sinking, I'm drowning under
Endless streams of confusion
I wonder
If I could stem the flow
Could you silence the thunder?"