I feel as though I have given away as much as I can bear,
Without receiving the same in return.
Oh no— I begin to worry.
Where has my selfless nature gone?
Has my genuine desire to uplift the souls around me,
Suddenly vanished from this universe?
Where have those eager and thriving sprouts been buried?
It seems my soil has become much too dry to nourish this growth any longer.
I worry more.
I feel so willing
So capable
But why are my heart and soul
Suddenly so malnourished?
You see truth is,
No matter how strong a plant,
Or how able they are to flourish,
They are less likely to reach this full potential
Without enough
Food
Water
And sunlight.
So yes,
I have become malnourished
But I hold hope
In the countless beings around me
To lend me what I need
To begin new growth.

How quickly the mind can become blind to the hurt, when the heart becomes entranced once more.

I wish to share with you
The patterns of destructive thoughts—
The ones that consume my mind
And contaminate my soul

I’d hoped it was time
FINALLY
I so badly need them to be free

I refrain
And keep them locked away
Trapped within the walls
I have so carefully built

And unfortunately
They shall remain put—
For you are not
Who I thought you were

You say I’m your one
Your love
The greatest you’ve known.
Mesmerized
By your eyes
Your touch
Your warm breath on mine.
I blink
You’re gone.
I seek answers
Tracing footsteps back
To where we used to lie.
Falling to the ground
I discover the universe I once dreamt
No longer in my line of sight.

Flash forward
It’s months later,
I choose to fall victim
Once more.
Succumb to these feelings.
Believing
Maybe
This time is different.
Curious
No—
Foolish
Once more
I feel lost
Confused
Spinning unwillingly.

I saw you drowning
so I came to help
but you pushed me under
and saved yourself instead

In a sudden moment
We realize that the idea
Of not knowing for just a little longer
Though causing every fiber of our being
To ache with uncertainty
Is slightly better
Than being broken by the truth