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  22h Darlene K Liles
lia
I wear my grin like porcelain—
polished, perfect,
cracked beneath.

They see the shine,
not the spiderwebs
that threaten to split me clean.

I laugh on cue,
walk the line,
but every step feels like a dare—
will I break,
or bend again?

No one notices the hairline fault.
They only see
a masterpiece
that never asked
to be displayed.

But here’s the twist
they’ll never know:
I dropped the real me
years ago.
Holding the smile on my face feels fake,
Talking about it only brings more hate,
I fear it might already be too late,
Outrunning time and tempting my fate.

They stand around me laughing at my mistake,
Not knowing what I'd do to just not be awake,
To not feeling as pointless as the poems I make.

Watching as it gets harder,
Drowning in the running water,
Hoping they turn the tap off at my offer,
But it brings them pleasure—to watch me suffer.

Laughing while i slip away,
Taking drugs to help the ache,
Taking pills like candy—with a smile on my face.

I fade away to only a whisper,
Watching life flicker.

The tap water is turning into a lake,
Slowly pulling me below the surface,
And all I do is hope to break.

But even drowning I still breathe,
Clinging to truths I half believe.

The mirrors cracked, but it doesn't lie,
It just tells half the truth, yet
There's still a fire beyond this cry.

The current pulls, but I don't cave,
Scars may flood, but I won’t drown—
This time, I swim in the lake. Barely not going down.
It begins, not with a storm—
but a whisper in the breeze,
a soft undoing of the knots
you didn’t know you tied.

They gave me your name like a family heirloom,
but never asked if it fit—
filled with your past,
but not your love.

I fold the memories like old toys,
hoping to give them
to whoever still cares.

There is pain, yes—
but quieter now.
A kind of ache that teaches
where love ends
and you begin.

This is the art:
not to serve,
but to surrender.
To walk away
with empty hands
and an open heart.

So let the name remain—
a ghost stitched into the hem
of who I was.
I wear it lighter now,
no longer mistaking it
for who I am.
I question why a beautiful boy like you would draw too,
Bold, thin red lines telling a story
Deep and ugly,
Full of hatred and guilt,
Seeping through your sleeves.
Did no one teach you
That pain, when silenced,
Finds its own voice?
That even roses bleed
When held too tightly?

I watch from close but feel so far,
Feeling guilty and lost,
Wondering what makes you draw too,
Hoping you find the end of the tunnel
Before it closes on you.

I would let you see yourself through my eyes—
That what lies beneath the scars
Are stories to come and beauty to be shown.

Let me remind you:
Your wound is not your worth.
You'll learn you don't have to bleed to be heard—
I hear you, and I’m listening.

So, with all that said,
I'll teach you my ways:
That you're not your scars,
Nor the ache that shaped them,
But a survivor of the pain
Laid out in lines,
Some short, some tall—but all the same.

So let the past bleed out in ink, not skin.
Let tomorrow find you softer, still whole.
You are not alone.
You have me.

— The End —