Freed from the blackness that fills my nights
Awoken from the nightmares plaguing my mind
For a short stretch only to receive a brief taste
Holding on for I know she must make haste

Like the foggy windows on a summers night
So have I felt the warmth of another
Never wanting to leave her comfort
Never wanting to see the light

Like roses at the peak of their bloom
Only to enjoy briefly till death ensues
Withered away and dying as they are
So am I breaking as we have to part

Joy is a bitter taste
For it never stays to long
You hold on until you are unable
Until it leaves you withdrawn

Am I but just another face
Another notch upon your bed
Scattered amongst the crowd
Overlooked and overdrawn

For if I know what is true
But I wish it were a lie
To face another second
As I feel my dreams die

On my own I must go
For you’ve taken to much
What I wish I would receive
I only gave to another

Weeks turn into months
The months drag on for years
As the clocks hands violently spin
Time seems to eloquently disappear

Lying for what seems to be eons
In hollow shell that once was
Praying for a new tomorrow
Never seemingly comes

The suns rays gently shine through
Only tease me with a glimmer of hope
That never seems to ensue
Wishing the warmth I have felt I never knew

Visual wonder seems to blend
Into an everlasting monotone grey
Staring into the empty wall
No stimulation to relieve my pain

Joy is nothing but word
For the mere feeling is left heard
And by my hands alone I sink
Into the darkness of night I’m never assured  

For imagination can thwart the coming days
Relieve my mind traveling on an escape
But for how long must you hold fast
Slowly as it becomes a twisted decay

For what I want I try to reach to grab
Only to grasp a hold for mere seconds
Slowly slipping through cracks of my hands
Returning to a bleak existence

As you search for the good you wish to find
In those few faces that abound
Your own misanthropic views
Seem to chase away those who are sound

So alone as you are to thee you must face
As your mind tears itself apart on endless race
Slowly you try as you fight against an uphill *****
Left to your own devices endless suffering without hope

Staring into halls
Shadowed in doubt
I want what I feel
I must never be without

Left on my own
I cannot escape my mind
Twisted distortions fill
What is never truly to arise

Time seems to drag on In this solitary confine
As you grow cold others seem to fall in line
Like an intense hunger that lingers for days
Only able watch into windows while others engage

So close as it is on the tip of your tongue
Only ripped from seems
Tragedy has only begun  
Never to feel the rays of the sun

How foolish it must be for I have felt much
How loathsome it is to be without one

Though I don’t want I cant help
but to Dream of the nights
When together we are alone
The world seems to be mine

For it is but my own luck I know will surely falter
My thirst is a grave company and I cannot satisfy
I want more till hurts till my well has run dry
I cant relent my own need for it is entrapped in my mind

Soon will you fade for you know what is to ensue
Though I try as I might I may never fully be rescued
For my hand is bleak as it is on a long winters night
The warmness fights while the cold stays alive

So if I am anything to much
If I am ever to soon
For what makes me feel alive
Is that which I pursue

Racing toward to stalk the ****
Ravenous in its hunt
Never to be quite fulfilled
Never it is enough

To surmise it is that which I have loved to much
Smothered till it bleeds thrown into the dust
Moderation is a word left unknown
Loving to much is a burdensome load

You’re lost upon your weakened knees
For who am I but to my own ill reprieve?
For though one knows what is to come
And can never quite be sure
What is often plain as day
So often wishing to ignore

Searching for answers in days left behind
An uncertain question for what it seems you’ll never find
Indeed the solutions are not always in what you obtain
Sometimes it leaves you empty and stained


Though plain as day it is to whom it pertains
Warning signs carved into her ****** shape
You struggle to comprehend for your desire is but just
You seek sweet refuge in what is a heavenly host

For what is so difficult is not always what is to ensue
Often what is so grueling is facing the truth

For uncertainty is a cruel company
Teasing your every thought
Deteriorating under its shadow
Plagued by its every walk

Too jaded to be alone
To cold to sit together
Tying the strings of the mind
In a tragedy which seems forever

As you hold onto the knots she gently ties
Affixed your clench as you desperately try
Futility drives the force
Together you are untied

How liberating a feeling
What a tragedy to play
The best part of reasoning
Is the end of our days

Although it is tragic
So must it ensue
Tasting bitter pavement
The end is the truth

Seems a ravaging horror
From a nightmarish hand
But liberates freedom
In one final stand

So it is time
How it is to flee
***** of all feeling
My soul is freed

Who am I but I wanderer
A hand to plot my coarse
Life everlasting
Freed from discourse

For if I must live to die
And I die as I hath lived  
What is the point in trying
Only to meet a cruel end

Clear in the glow of the night she shines
Her kisses bitter like an endless drive
Vision become blurred as muddy creek
In her Blissful hand guides the meet

In gluttony partaking in endless delight
Her glow above me surpasses, dulls all fright
Numbed hands and feet in a eerie room
Every sip burns the throat in darkened gloom

Never enough is her kiss for I am in need
She whispers fondly of the end of all our dreams
Best friend I never wanted never to leave my side
The only enemy to ever to touch me deep inside

Oh I love her so when she brings forth an intoxicating whine
How am I ever to be happy when she constantly fills my mind?
Dreaming of the days when we are to meet
Shadowy doubt fills the spaces in my seat

But she is torturous harlot
When again I am left alone
Thrown to scatter
As a dog without a bone

Dependpendable she is spry
I have never known such
She brings me to my knees
She is a lingering ghost

As warm as she enters
Just as cold she leaves
Shaking to the core
Captured like a thief