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Shana Aug 2018
Have you ever felt like you don’t matter,
Everything you do amounts to nothing.
You just get ignored and don’t know why,
Constantly wondering what your doing wrong,
What you could have done better.
Shana Mar 2018
So here I am,
Sitting on the bathroom floor,
Wondering if I’m even worth more,
Feeling trapped inside my mind,
I’ve become a slave to what I feel inside,
Everything is spinning,
Out of control,
I’ve given up the fight,
I’ve allowed my blood to spill.

Don’t call me or text me,
Don’t pretend that you care,
I wasn’t worth your time before,
What reason is there to care now?
Let me dissapear,
There’s no reason for me to be here anymore.

May I wish you the best.
My curtain call has come,
And this is the final set.
Shana Mar 2016
Silence was key,
That's the only way she could be,
That's what they taught her to be,
That's what she needed to be,
She needed the survival,
She needed the head space,
She needed the long lonely nights trapped in her head,
She needed it for her sanity,
Her silence was to be the death of her,
Her silence caused her ending,
She never allowed words to leave her mind,
So she drowned in the feelings she hid.
Shana Mar 2016
I feel like I'm breaking,
I've been broken,
I feel like I'm slipping,
I've already fallen,
I feel like I'm dying,
I'm already dead inside,
I feel like crying,
These tears are already dry.
Shana Feb 2016
Don't mess up.
Don't show them you're broken.
Breathe again.
You're fine.

Shut up.
I cant breathe with you talking.
Why are you always so loud.
Why cant I think for myself.
I wish I could breathe.

You're so stupid.
You aren't supposed to breathe anymore.
You aren't good enough for that remember.
You are losing to me.
I knew you could never win.

I don't need you.
Go away.
I want you to go away.

That's funny.
I will never go away.
I am a part of you.
Shana Jan 2015
I'm Hurt,
I'm Scared,
I'm Sad,
But most of all,
I'm Tired.

I'm Tired of not being good enough,
tired of doing everything wrong,
tired of listening to everyone fighting,
tired of being your puppet,
just tired.

And the funny thing is,
you don't even see it,
and you excuse?
your tired too.

But the meaning is very different,
while you catch up on hours of sleep,
I sink deeper into my own thoughts,
my own misery.

But if you knew,
what I was truly tired of,
you'd say its my own fault,
and tell me I'm fine.
Shana Dec 2014
I'm falling fast,
Losing grip,
My judgement is clouded,
I can't think.

I know this place,
I've been before,
It seems like home,
But so much more.

I'm addicted,
To the pain it gives,
As I try to breath,
I sink back in.

In the dark,
Im all alone,
I gave up fighting,
I've let them win.

I've lost control,
I've never had,
And I've slipped back into old habits,
I won't be able to control.
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