Senryū one

Escape from Haiku
short long breathe in time
breathed out longing to go live

Senryū two

Seed fall fruit feed pigs;
passenger pigeons,
fertilized this forest, you know.

Senryū three

Discipline, science,
since some time ago,
ready readers write old seed.

—an echo sword cuts through the sounds,
time is made of glass. Fragile as the brokenness
in pass.

—a dagger tilt into the chest. The very part,
where all sores dawn. Rising until you see
the pain appearing as heavy breathe.

—sheath; putting away sharp ends of past hurt.
Piercing deeply as longing to be free. The battle
is plenty, as the many who feel so alone.
You aren't the first!

In these blade works, working hard to survive,
on the killing of time. To bat an eye; swinging on
the looks of acting out of pride.

—it cuts anyone deeply, fighting to survive,
fighting in the many struggles of this LIFE.

Is it to hold a knife in defence, or attack,
the question of every human being.

breath of solstice breeze
lilac tipped with sun dried grass
cicadas sharp chant

I.

First it’s a look shared through the glass
A window between us

The feeling that passes through me
When I watch him explain the impossible
And make it look easy

Then it’s the wondering that overtakes me
Behind the counter where I’ve lost myself in thought
Surrounded by books that won’t tell me
If he’s thinking of me too

It’s the ache that comes from longing
To hear the sound of his voice
But I’m too scared to call
Unless I’m already drunk

It’s that feeling in the pit of my stomach
Everyone calls butterflies, but really
It feels like too much, just so much

It happens when you start to fall.

And it’s a slap in my own the face
As I hide deeper inside of myself
Because he is beautiful
And I am all sharp edges

He is enough
But I am just not ready

II.

I always find myself going back to you
When I imagine how I wanted it to be
And what I wish I had said

It’s so strange to be here
So many years later
Still wondering if it was you all along

We shared this kiss once
You and I
Once of those steamy
Spur of the moment
You only live once type of deals

I know you remember it too

My heart hurts just thinking about it because
It was always such a blur of wrongtimewrongplacewrongsomething
Between me and you

I guess I never stopped being too scared to call
Unless I was already drunk
It’s been years since I heard your voice
But I am haunted

That guy, that boy, that man.
The words roll round my head,
Like a big bingo cage,
Full of thin razor blades.

They asked me how I knew
That I loved only you.
Do you know what I said?
The first thing that came to my head?

I told them you're like lo-fi indie
One tear and you're there for me
Waiting to sing and help me through
One hour in your arms and I'm back to new.

And, like the music, you fill out the edges
The sharp that cut up my senses
You pad them out and soften them up
So when I fall, I don't feel so struck.

It’s waiting for fake love. Wanting to feel alive.
Putting a label on everything. Well If I have to put a label on it.. I’d  called this untitled love. With a one way street.

Why is it I always want have I can’t have.
Then I run away from everything else.
I let my heart get broken over and over again.
Why do I tend to trust my feelings.
I don’t want to be in love.

I could write a million one words about you.
I tell myself no don’t message him. He’s not interested. Then message him anyway.
Just maybe if I vanished they’d notice.

Because sooner or later I’m just going to give up on the matter.
I always do. Because I hurt myself too much.
I wish I could stop dreaming about you and thinking about you 24/7
You’re just too bad for me.

I’m the only person you’ll meet
Who’d tell you the straight up brutal truth.
Maybe my words are too sharp.