At square one again.
All the improvement is in the past.
Weak mined , aching body and fragile heart.
Why did I loose progress fast?
Deadly thoughts, worse are the actions, that grasp me once more.
Tell me how to escape my self, so I can be free for this hell.
It urgent, an emergency but there no life line that can help.
The only line I think of, is that hanging rope.
Sorry for my honestly.
I know its hard to take, your ears are use to sugar coated sentences,
dripping in misleading words and expressions of false satisfaction regarding life.
Back to square one but this time I notice the cage that will never let me move forward again.
I have no key, no help and no way out.

I'm unsure what's happened
I thought I got better.
But currently I feel,
more worthless then ever.
Sitting alone, feelings are mixed,
Thoughts are crazy, I'm feeling quite sick.
Each option I choose, sings a regret.
I know that I should change my dangerous mindset.
Is not your fault, don't trouble your self.
I'm just troubled ,that I can't find myself help.
The load is so heavy, emotions burst at the seams.
Please have some patience my amazing sunbeam.
Go if you wish, have time to rekindle.
I wish for you to stay whole and not to dwindle.

Nervous for my future.
The year is at it's end.
Those I know are leaving,
I'll loose some of my friends
Exams a here now,
Prepared I am not
What worries me the most,
Is that I might be forgot.
To do this all over ,
it is more then i can bare.
But i have to do it,
" If i want to get anywhere".
My anxiety weighs me down,
To the point I get up.
Next year will be better.
I;ll finally find my spot

Simmer down my sorrow,
bellowing in your anger wont recoil what happened.
Don't fret dear heart,
the sadness you feel will once again dissolve.
Dear legs of mine,
stand taller then you once did.
Little mind,
dont underestimate your knowledge and your power.
For you create the struggles which have been and will be endured.