my mouth tastes like pennies and your hand is too warm on my thigh under your parents table and i wish you would move it and i know the way you squeeze softly would be attractive to other girls but i am not other girls

i used to read books out loud to you and when i stumbled over words you would stroke my hair and i don’t think you even heard a word i was saying

you say you love math because there is no uncertainty and i think about how i am never a fixed point and i wonder if this is why you’re not always there when i wake up

you tell me you know me better than myself

my face feels too tight and flushed and i am not a crier but i wish i was now

you like to control me and i like to control me and i feel guilty for this

her lips look very soft on your cheek and it’s been a few months but i remember you never let me kiss you in public. she has bigger eyes than me and i still think about you

there are 2 bottles of sleeping pills and my favorite knife and a pack of cigarettes under my bed and i kissed a boy whose name i don’t know last weekend and it felt good

i haven’t cried myself to sleep in three weeks

your hand is too high up on my leg and i want to go home

you're blood
but i feel like our love
has turned into lost water

we don't talk as much
but today we did
i got you for a whole hour

your face upon my screen
i don't think i realized how much i have missed you
i didn't realize how much i missed our laughs
until you had to go
and my throat swelled
my eyes watered
choked up a goodbye

screen shut
and the tears wouldn't stop coming
hands shaking
how could i let you slip away

have your heart given back to you
shattered and bruised multiple times
then come and ask why im so bitter