Crackling criss-crossing blue in mind. It scissors down the lanes through the pipes and tubes and little dividers. Electrical mind numbing beauty. Veins-bursting in excited anticipation. Convulsions and scenic skittering routes. Into the Nexus! Here simmers what we are thinking and believing. Our mind's eye focuses and drips into the pool until completion. Psionic figures dance flicker through life existence. Pulse-width fluctuations. Tiny menagerie of our Will. Scribbling through dusted panes of time interface. All afire with ourselves once we have discovered ourselves. Nano-tech emotions. Hope fear anger mercy curiosity buzzing swarms of grey goo jibbering and bubbling in an artificial mind-****. What is all this allusion? Nothing complicated. Speculation on future times where sensual technological biological singularity is paramount. In my room where the clocks are taped over and the sun is dark and dim. Through the windows I see myself. The boxes on the floor emanate simple clickings with melodies intertwined casually. I myself appear redundant. I have done this and so have others. To discuss oneself is worthless unless you become convinced you are another entity gazing back across the room. I feel I am being watched. I become cautious as he may have noticed. Tingling weightlessness tickles in waves in both heads. The Jazz Classic appears. Old dark men and women in hazy environments. Organic supposition or cold observation? Both hold importance so let us appreciate it all. The cello quivers and hums with vibration. Fingers callused and riveted like the age-old corn field bother still strings. A child hums to just myself. What does he want? I never asked him for an audience. Yet he freely gives it to me. Now he multiplies. Or she? Children confuse and cause one to be apprehensive. Nothing and silence. Silence in movement. Cease my visual stimulation for a couple seconds each. The child is back. What does he speak? Pray inside the rubble? Heal in this place? In disgrace? I do not know. His octaves are meshing together. Whining and thrumming with strange alterations. Some madmen tweaks my ears. Maybe he knows the child? I'm not sure. Let us continue on. The flute is the child. Old cello, you have stopped? These musings mean nothing. I would look upon them in a year and think nothing of it. Yet it feels as if this time is important. Da Vinci knocks on the door. Not as if I wanted to talk to it. Wouldn't mind I suppose. He is gone. We talked but I do not remember the conversation. Perhaps we've all talked but we just don't remember our conversations. That's ridiculous though. Then anything is possible. We could have flown to the moon on scarlet weasels outfitted with the latest nano-pores that secreted pure liquid indulgence. And we did because I just imagined we might have. However, I don't remember actually doing it. Just what I thought it might have been like. How frustrating. My thoughts are the same as all others who write out their thoughts when under the influence of yourself. It always seems like some thing is scuttling near my feet or under the nightstand; just out of view. Strange. I would be afraid. No reason to fear that which doesn't bother me. No reason to fear much of anything. That's been said before. Why are we so often concerned with saying that which has been said before? Cliche? auump-ump auump-ump auump-ump little thumping noise in my ears. That vibration is calming. Every night I am awake. Every day I seem asleep. I do not like it but I do not care yet I allow it to be what it will. Vision defaults to out of focus. My eyes always cross if I cease trying to control them. People are strange. Animals are strange. Same thing I guess. Someone will find that clever. Someone will find it cliche. This someone won't care. ****** fantasy permeates day to day. More entertaining than living a fantasy though. ***. Not that entertaining. Perhaps no one knows how to do it properly anymore. Maybe we never did. Maybe some people are just disenchanted with it. When I'm by myself, I never have any ****** desire. When around others, I generally think of it out of curiosity: what would it be like to please the person in front of me? The only enjoyment I've had with *** would consist of pleasing another or observing another ****. The human body is intriguing. Definitely. I really do think so. Sometimes I look at my own. Not out of appreciation really. Just the fact that I have body allows me to investigate it and understand it more. Pain is merely a stage one can get past, so I suppose I injure myself sometimes to see how I react. It's like I need to check I'm still working properly. I can't tell when I'm tired. I feel something, but when I ask myself if I'm tired, I murmur back, "I don't know." Maybe that is why I stay up till early mornings? I wanted to add again that the human body is beautiful and unappealing all in the same space. Perhaps the unattractiveness and softness and strangeness produces attraction. A negative and a negative equals a positive. Three negatives likes to fluctuate. In my mind at least. I may ask another to remove their clothing and whatnot during those intimate moments. Eh, never quite feel like having *** though. I like the emotions and sensuality of just looking at someone. They usually want to physically play around with each other. I think I enjoy fighting more. One day I'll leave everyone except I'll reminisce on those I enjoyed meeting. Maybe come back and visit? I would like to ride something quickly through an empty desert. Find my own food and water. Create shelter. Think by myself. My room is the smallest desert I have and the biggest. I have more in my head but I only occupy one at a time. I suppose I like I do like things like all others. I mean, materials can be nice. If I impart meaning on to an object it gains importance. I see it vital to also say that if it were to be lost, then I wouldn't mind and I would obtain something else or nothing at all.The constitution. Just mentioned by some woman in my room. Or in my ears would be more correct. Constitutional Rights. I honestly don't see the need for them. I was criticized for burbling that once. We should not need a constitution. We should be able to do what we like to do without fear or concern. Unless natural fear and concern appears. Now that may confuse a bit. Right to bear arms. I shouldn't have to be told or allowed to massive bear arms if I feel the need to have them. Big hairy bear arms. Curious little mishap. Freudian slip as Johnny said once? Danger Danger. Anyway, Right to bare arms. I shouldn't have to be told, as I look back,  go back and throw in that comma after told, that I'm allowed to bare arms and defend myself. I'll just do it if the need arises. Freedom of speech. That already has many issues these days. However, there shouldn't have been a need to tell people they have freedom of speech. Speech should have been freely allowed and never oppressed in  the first place. Theme? We have erred so much in the past and I would think sometimes we ignore that and just try make little cosmetic fixes by saying it's okay. Another point. Hold that: side discomfort. I sometimes feel like a little spider or creature is crawling or skittering on my leg under the covers or I'll change the music to Galaxy 2 Galaxy 90's hi-tec jazz there we go. Done! Now back! Or I forget what I said about the spiders. Another point: what? ******, curse damnable ****. Can't recollect what it was I was connecting together. Something that tied in to deceiving people into things are okay. I could go on about consumerism and all that jazz. Instead I'm listening to some techno-jazz whatever-decided-to-call-it. Hyphenated phrases are fun when I decide they are appropriate. English and grammar in such can be cool but at the same time I want to say **** it and stay proper. Do both. Acknowledge how to write and speak "correctly," but as long as someone understands what you are trying to say, then why correct more? Someone large doesn't like the fact I make a lot of noise in the morning. I stole some speakers and subwoofer from the room next to me as I was going to say Austin.  They are on the floor and whichever large person lives below me is probably annoyed or was. I don't spend any of my actual time despising them, but I'll easily say I despise them when someone asks. Otherwise it isn't worth wasting time on. Perhaps the vibration quivers downstairs and shakes them silently. The greate beast is perturbed and sneaky vibrations cause electro-annoyance! Her pulsewidth as I understand it must be like a super-saw as I think it. Silence. Some woman said it's just a feeling. HEA not sure what why I put that sounds like a garageband song. Switched to Inspiration! That is what I did this night. Finally start writing and making things again. Even though I never did and always did. My head sometimes hurts from thinking. Never truly though. Gotta say those things to keep the conversation going. That is really the only reason I say anything. To keep the conversation going. Otherwise I'd just watch people and be just fine. Just yelled "bahh," out loud (didn't sound the comma) because I felt the need or the want. Same. Wrong keys erased. sdas=a====dddddddddd Sorry. Oh well. Oh My. How the time flies goodbye. Going nowhere. Could write more but I felt the slight flicker of wanting to stop. So I do. What an ending. Now I'm only typing to continue the conversation with myself. Just thought ******* sounds good melody. Do as I sayt way to go good job. STOPSDMFA

****** a

Guess I'll read this little conundrum I wrote up. Stop writing ******. Stop EDITING

I am a ten second poet
much after that
it gets even more jibberish

Snapping and cracking it moves with a clink
jibbering and jabbering beneath the kitchen sink

It backs up the pipes with stagnant decay
reeking and stinking all through the day

Exhaling self-loathing, skin milky and pale
demoniac from twisted tongue to forked tail

Feasting upon rats it swallows them whole
a creature mischievous, bloodthirsty and cold

He devours Halloweeners, then all their sweets
surprising passing strangers by yanking their feet -

"I'll yoink your tootsies, tickle your toes
then what next, uh oh who knows?!"

Last Christmas it blinded the neighbours so they couldn't see
burnt the decorations and shat under their tree

The poor little children waking up that following dawn
to bits of their grandparents spread across the lawn -

Oh I can't sleep, scared of my own home
sick of being stuck with this thing all on my own

People are dead and my moral passions to blame
my inability to **** has caused all this pain

So tonight when it crawls from its slumber, I'll be there with my gun

Oh come my sweet little demon, let's have some fun!

- The Wingle Wangle Song -

"Wingle Wangle Wyrmtail
Is a wicked little fairy -
bloodshot eyes, a grimy disguise
he doeth not scare me

Wingle Wangle Wyrmtail
Bathes in sweat and cold blood -
Sneaks into homes, steals people's bones
Separates the bad from the good

Wingle Wangle Wyrmtail
Roams all night, sleeps all day -
A blighter joyous and macabre
so happy and gay

Wingle Wangle Wyrmtail
you may dance to all the children's cries -

but beware Wingle Wangle
within a barrel lies your demise."

Words, phrases, exclamations...
great efforts to birth well-articulated strings
sentences, paragraphs going nowhere
just evaporating into the air
- after their pleading, violent spewing forth!
mad workings of mouths and lips, of tongues
raging torrents of language
worthless, pointless, meaningless...
one could say anything -
say everything!
enunciate; flowing, eloquent
or ranted, rambled
lightning-speed creation: disastrous!
no matter to be coherent -
to be nonsensical
speech is of absolutely no value;
devoid of all worth
perfectly useless, audible abyss...

So I'm finished and ******* surrender
it's been a journey traveled far too long
hope has long been departed and gone
painfully overdue, it's undeniably time
-So I'll shut my ******* blabbering, jibbering jaws
and I'll do it RIGHT NOW!

A  Articulate
C  Christ
D  Demon
C  Challenge

The writer group
session Australian
Hard Rock Lion
Rebirth Laptop
All grouped in
The City
Singer she thinks
her style of the pick
Raw sugar on me
The Taylor Swiftly
Her wings of
gravity
No  Ladybug  
Patriot Brady Bee

A group meeting
Got stung doing the
jitterbug
Jazzy lounge Bearhug
Music notes of Junk
Whole marriage records
So group me in
((Single))

Signed rotten Platinum
fink
Miss the concert line
Jibb
Jibbering
Riveting
Jive Five
The tribe
all feathered
Group( Kiss)
Dark eyes vibe
ACDC
the King of rock
You shock me all night
Elvis ain't nothing
hounded hitchhiked
ACDC-Money Talks
50 shades of the Greyhound
Those twin singers
Tinker Bell Groupies
Now it's the
Hells Bell
The four letter word

F--K_
F---K E Fake

What a ***** of
the light finger
The bands became
AARP Old Rocker
chair
What a **** in her
rocker pants

Drum roll
Headlights
Rock and Roll
Tour group of

FRANCE F- Friendship  R -Remain
A- And N- Never C-Can E-End

ITALY I- T-Trust  A-And L-Love Y You

ENGLAND E-Every N-New G-Guy L Leaves
A-After N-Ninety D-Days

The world in
Eighty tight money Days
Group 8 days a week
ahh I need
your love girl
I guess you know its true
And when you're Pregnant
Hey we are Rockers
we don;t have a clue
I phone fingers do the
Hard rock Art of music
strumming
Please no old
folks snoring

Days so long belly
stretched
The canvas
one-day creation
The car broke
her water broke
Due date
280 days
Group Pregnancy
pays

The mechanic
charging by
the hour
(Midas--
That Callgirl
not interested

Age of the rush
Pinterest pictures
Poison Ivy itching

Slower age Envy
To crush *******

And going back
Forever modern age
Hey world be clever
ACDC

We are all  a group
linked
My jackpot
My baby
most blissful
Inked in Pink

if only i had the courage
i would speak up to those
jibbering mouthes they own

if only i had the courage
let me be free and happy
avoiding negative thoughts
on my surrounding

if only i had the courage
would i carelessly not worry
about who or how
or why or what

(c.r)

It's true I have some regrets in life
The truth is..... I think now..... I should
    have been Zardo and not Bardo
Zardo I think has more of a 'Zing' to it
It's a bit like Zorro
For I too wear a mask, I write hidden
    behind a pseudonym
Moving stealthily like some elusive
    Ninja warrior,
Or like some swashbuckling pirate
    hero yeah!
I descend upon the Site with a
   flourish
Swinging in like Errol Flynn trailing
    behind me great romance and
        adventure
I bring my magic, I dazzle with my
    swordplay, my verbal acrobatics
Send all the shadows fleeing,
rescuing the poor damsels, the sad
   heroine grieving
Releasing the downtrodden from
their onerous chains and shackles
Bringing Justice once more to the
    World
I bring them all a gift... the gift of... of
    Freedom!!!
Then as suddenly as I came... I'm gone,
    yea! I vanish
But not before leaving my mark, with
    lightning strokes, my Calling Card
A big "Z" Z for Zardo, written,
     emblazoned with my sword:
The people they all gather around
  just like detectives after a crime
They view my wonderful damage,
   can only stare and marvel
Then someone shouts, he points a
    finger
"Look!! The sign! Z!!! It was Him...it...it
    was Zardo!!!"
"Zardo!!!" the whole crowd gasps in
    awed hushed tones,
"It...it was Zardo!!!"

All I need now is a good theme tune
[Song: O Zar..arr..do! Where do you come from/ Where do you go Zar..arr..do!]

                         II

O! the ladies of an evening, they come
    out onto their balconies to coo
To watch the sun set & the rising of
   the Moon
Secretly they sigh and whisper onto
    themselves
"O! Zardo, where art thou, my Sweet
    Prince, my Secret Love
How my heart it longs, it yearns for
    thee,
I can see you, see you almost, upon a
    striking Black Horse galloping
[Song: O! Zarr...arr...do, your brooding
    dark looks, your flashing blade/
Riding through the Glens of Ireland
    yeah!].
O! Zardo, in my dreams I walk with
    thee, you hold me in your arms
O! Zardo, can I see it...will you not show it to me....let me touch it, hold it,
   feel it...your... your gleaming sword,
     your flashing blade yea!
Your golden pen from which
   beautiful dreams are made
O! Zardo your golden Excalibur like
   sword
Please! O Please! Unsheathe it!"
[Song: O! Zar..arr..do, with your eyes so soft/ But your arms so strong/
O! Zar..arr..do, Greatest Lover of them
    all!]

O! the wind it rustles in the trees, a fleeting shadow flits across the fields
"O! Zardo, is that you ? Is that you ? "
   they cry,
My Darling ! my Sweetness !
My shadowy Knight, my Heart's
   Delight".
[Song:  The Wind it whispers
   Zar..arr..do/ The valleys they echo
    his name]
O! Zardo if only you were here... if
   only".

                             III

Meantime back in my sanctuary
   hideaway home, safely ensconced
I reside....like some insanely brilliant
   criminal mastermind
Here I can be myself, here I can laugh,
Here I can unwind, let my guard
   down
Remove my cape and mask, lay my
   sword aside
Here I can feast in peace & toast my
   Art sublime
And around my fireside wildly dance
   and sing
             "O! they know me,
       Yet they know me not Ha! Ha!"
Like some impish Rumpelstiltskin.....
[Song: O! Zar..arr..do, Nobody knows from whence he comes/ Or where he goes/ Mysterious Masked stranger/ Fearless Lone Ranger... Zar..arr..do!]

                           IV

But now, back here in the real world
I must again resume my humble
   place/role...my double life
Don my Civy clothes once again
& like a chameleon blend in with the
   crowd
Just another nameless face...a mere
   office worker by day
[Distant Song: O! Zar..arr..do]
Here I must play another game,
   maintain my secrecy at all times,
Feeling like a Secret Agent, feeling
   like a spy
I must yes!....I must live a lie
For they must never know my secret
Who l really am... my true identity
Yes! I must be merciful to them &
   mercy show them (& to myself also)
For my sun...my sun it would burn too
   brightly for them
They'd all be starstruck, yea! they'd go
   all funny, all wobbly on me
They'd be stuttering and stammering,
   jibbering and jabbering
They'd go all self-conscious on me,
   not know what to say or do
They'd be all staring, they'd be all
   agog
"I never knew what Genius would
   ever look like", they'd say,
"And all the time it was sitting there
  right in front of me, right in our
    midst,
But... but he's so quiet and he looks so
   ordinary"
They'd come down from other floors
   just to see me
They'd whisper excitedly "Is that Him?  Is that Him?"
And the others would reply "Yes! that's Him, that's Genius! that's what
      Genius looks like"
Why! it'd be suffocating, I'd find it
   hard to breathe
I'd grow self-conscious too
I'd be just like an exhibit in the zoo.

And yet, y'know, there's this girl at
   work, she's really sweet
She always has a lovely smile just for
   me
So quiet and so graceful
O! how I wish... how I wish sometimes
I could just tell her, reveal myself to
   her, the real me
Silently I call out to her, "No! this isn't the real me you see before you
No! I'm not this dithering Klark Kent
   type office mouse
Look!!! (ripping off my shirt and tie revealing my Superman/Zardo vest)
Me! I'm Superman! Yes! I'm Zardo!!!"
[Music strikes up: O! Zar..ar..do! So
  strong, so gallant, so bold! Zar..ar..do]
And she'd start to say almost afraid
" You, you're Zardo" and she'd start to
   swoon, to feel faint
But I'd grab her and take her in my
   arms, my strong embrace
"No!" I'd assure her, "don't be afraid,
    no harm will come to thee
Fear not, you won't go aflame
Look! I'm just another human being,
   just like yourself"
"But you, you're Zardo", she'd protest,
" Look! " I'd say smiling, "touch me
   and see, pinch me if you like
I'm just flesh and blood, no different
   than you",
"Come!" I'd say, "take my hand, climb up here onto my horse, Let me take you to the stars and beyond
Yea! Let me take you home, home to my place"
And she'd take my hand and off we'd go
Galloping away together into the moonlit night.
[Song: O! don't go Zar..arr..do, don't leave us here all alone.... They call him Zar..arr..do.....].

And his legend, it goes on....
                                     
                    ­                                                              "Z"

ksywa* or ła(h) ła(h) - or just simply ksyva -
   and that's really pushing it,
                        it almost looks russian -
                like the łord:     vechki vechki vesteya
you do the german thing and it becomes
             veschki veschki vesteya -
                         i.e. véshkí véshkí -
                            and the acute accent means?
throw the ****** into the air!
                            and hope to catch it, when it lands
on the iota with a dot above it, like a halo,
     or the parlance of a saint gibbering (by now you know
that you can pronounce the dz unit, because
           you reall don't say gee-beer-ing;
                       or ****... you write it as jibbering?).
       oh... the word ksyva?
                                    when we're still in school
we get nicknames...
                       what was my nickname?
  given to me by a bue of a blonde?
                                                         ­      dad.
  that ***** you up... it's not like you get to handle
a nickname like that as if it were akin to: ****, cunty,
                 *******...             wormhole....
                                                 c'mon!          dad?!
what sadist does that?!
                                  how about a variant, like:
     herr mannelig            or herr holger.... and then
we can dance and cheer and drink ourselves to death
   ahoy valhalla! - style
                             i put the hyphen there because
i wanted to encapsulate the whole cheer! but not really.
    followed up by: like.
                                        but i'm really proud of myself,
i managed to solve a du doku.... ****... a su doku
                  completely off my rockers, and as you might
or might not know, no. 8987 is classified as fiendish....
this is the first time i managed to solve a fiendish category
su doku without being allowed the 4 clues
       you get when you phone up the publishers and
get the autocue...
                it looked like this:

8 7 5 9 2 3 6 1 4
2 3 9 1 4 6 5 7 8
6 4 1 7 5 8 9 2 3
9 2 4 5 3 1 8 6 7
1 5 7 6 8 2 3 4 9
3 8 6 4 7 9 2 5 1
7 6 8 2 9 4 1 3 5
4 9 2 3 1 5 7 8 6
5 1 3 8 6 7 4 9 2

          but all this leads to is more conceptualisation,
*******, the orientals invented something
  beyond western imitation, i.e. beyond the haiku!
this really is the chiral form of the haiku!
                       some puzzles have timed designations
for being solved, e.g. samurai sudoku no. 555: 34min.
         who the **** times this sort of bewildering activity?
capitalists... competition... how about i just do the puzzle
by way of relaxing, when doing it, rather than competing
from some ****** plastic imitation of gold's worth of trophy?

i'm trying to find the genesis of the puzzle's existence,
sure, i can fly to japan and talk to some yogi, or yoga or kung fu master,
but i want to do it myself...

     the best i came up with?

        convergence / divergence of the co-ordinate concept
                   of a two-dimensional graph...
          exploiting the two-dimensional conceptualisation -
          into a three-dimensional "space".

          well... because it's a bit like this:
      
     (.)squared
                       (. .)squared

                                               (. . .)squared

     (. . . .)squared
                                      (. . . . .)squared

           and you're basically for interlocking coordinations of
the same number, e.g. 5 with 5, 6 with 6.

        these beastly, dragon-equivalent orientals really know
how to play the numbers game, for one: there's a billion of them,
and second: they don't have an alphabet...
           like marco polo suggested:
             they write out the equivalent to a da vinci -
but all it sounds like is ma! or da! or ya! -
      among variant, in that, almost infinant "number" of interpolations.