"guardedness" poems
It pulls me deep with a grip so relentless
It swirls me senseless with tendrils so sensuous
It overwhelms me so with determined fervour
I can't breathe, I can't fight, I get pulled under.
It renders me helpless but every bit I'm enjoying
These currents they push and carry, entranced I'm dancing
Try to swim and navigate but almost seem futile
Defy all logic, in this magical enchantment I smile.
I squeeze in an occasional breath that's deep
Reality streams in like water running in steep
But in a heartbeat I exhale to expel it all out
For I am addicted to the current and its strong-armed clout.
It's a whole new realm that has been so long hidden
Mystical and whimsical, this overgrown path that's hardly ridden
Fortunate it feels to have discovered such a find
So consumed, that it fills my body and my mind.
This tidal wave in my heart, with strength so unbelievable
Wearing away the uncertainty and everything else sensible
As it beats upon the shore of my guardedness
Revealed the tender core filled with love that's limitless.
Forever I wish to be submerged in this dream-like state
Floating and drifting, clumsily in a child-like gait
I have found myself in this love I'm drowning
Swim up and awaken is a thought I'm not longing.
Engulfed in a blanket of love's sweet loving
Feeble attempt to embrace back is all I'm trying
"Enjoy it, and receive what you can" said the voice in my head
My heart replies, "I think I'll love her forever instead".
Jul 27, 2014
Jul 27, 2014 at 9:33 PM UTC
strip me of the defenses i wear
to protect myself from the cold
shoulders, the wicked stares
slip the armor from my speech
and reassure me
that i do not need it here,
past the judgment of the daytime
take the stony demeanor
from where it chafes against
my soft skin-
let it lay, discarded,
on the floor with my guardedness,
my cynicism
let me be the angel
i have learned to smother
let me spread my wings
without bruising them
on mankind's abrasive habits
here, where sin is not forgiven
but rather accepted
have me whole and nothing more
with no more negative
space-
in this room,
mold me, with accepting hands,
into what i always was
into something small, something
honest, something trusting
let me let my guard down
Mar 20, 2013
Mar 20, 2013 at 7:39 PM UTC
Draft #2:
its now thursday without my words
flowing the morning as I attempt a divergence
along those lines
we found in the depth that uncovered
a space so delicious.
true and just a little vulnerable
its those openings
whispered on lips, the soft brush of your tongue burning still
i laughed because touching your tender guardedness
to glimpse that secret delicate you
(as your eyes captured me )
that i will hold gentle
Jun 17, 2010
Jun 17, 2010 at 12:43 AM UTC
This is me
Breaking softly, softly
Like crisp mounds of sand
succumbing to the winds.
Because sand
is porous. Unretentive
I'm like this sand
Forgetting good memories
Forgetting conflicts
Forgetting them all at once.
•
Breaking softly, softly
like a house
losing its life to a fire in minutes
Because fire
has no regard for history.
Is wild. Persistent
And I'm like this house
Yielding to the gentle build up of this sweet inferno
Disregarding my age-old vows to "never be bait"
•
And breaking softly, softly
like a feeble brick-wall
Under the downpour of torrential rains. Because brick-walls
are volatile. Unstable.
I'm like this brick-wall
crumbling under the weight of my shortcomings
under the weight of my non-stop errors.
•
You are wind.
Blowing away my reasons for guardedness
Because you've given me less reasons to be
You are fire
Having no regards for the history behind my careless habits
Because there's really no need for it anymore.
You are rain.
Eroding this sanctuary I call
"The place of logicality"
Because logicality never won in the Place of Emotions.
•
But this doesn't mean that I'll stop
Resisting the winds, the fires, the rains. Resisting you
And why?
I don't know either.
And I don't know who will win this war
You, or my stubborn heart.
•
But truth remains that
this is me
Breaking softly, softly
For you.
Jan 14, 2019
Jan 14, 2019 at 11:35 AM UTC
I want you to be my princess
God willing I will be your prince
I need you to kiss me in the moonlight
I don't think you could make me happier
Than you already do
I knew my words were cliche
But how else was I supposed to say
That she made my heart burst with love
Love that could not be quelled
That begged to burst forth
But was kept inside
Because of the guardedness of my heart
Because of memories of the pain
That sprung from saying it last time
Feb 17, 2015
Feb 17, 2015 at 12:29 AM UTC
rain…
rain
down on me
saturate built-up walls of
over-guardedness so they may crumble
and set free who I used
to be
and then…
I’ll
stand tall
as before and partake in
love’s offerings
I beg you
rain…
rain
down on me
r u s h over me
let
each
drip drop
lot
sink soul-deep
swish -swash away painful stains
that’s taken up residence and evict residue of dissolved dreams that scream…
“you've failed to make us come true”
brighten
up my blues
teach me to sing songs of better days
even…
in the midst of life’s worse
storms
so…
every morning
I’ll rise with the energy of
'It’s great being me' coursing through
my veins
let
the fresh scent
of after-shower inspire belief
all I’ve gone through
wisdom is my
gain
rain...
rain
rain
down
on
me
Jan 26, 2015
Jan 26, 2015 at 9:29 PM UTC