why can’t you see that?

you’re shouting at me to the point where you break me,

i’m lying on the ground in tears with a booming headache.

you’re putting words into my mouth,

telling me that i’m not trying, rhat i don’t care about anything, that i don’t give a **** about you.

thanks for all those curse words, now i know what i’m worth.

worth nothing

i don’t care about anything because i’m gonna ******* **** myself soon

there’s no point in living so

i’m gonna **** myself.

wether that be today , next week or next month.

i’m gonna fuckinf do it

because to you and everyone else here

i don’t mean anything

i’m just a toxic ***** who manipulates everyone

i don’t try hard enough

i don’t care

i don’t give any ***** about everyone

get it all out until you feel better

and peer up and realise you’ve broken me again

you shattered my already shattered pieces

it’s dust floating away

and all i can do is scoop it up and hope that i can rebuild

i believe i have it but im no professional and im not self diagnosing because i will be told that im attention seeking

I am a warrior.
Stronger than her demons.
Braver than the darkness.

How much is depression a feeling
versus a way of being
I can’t remember anymore
it’s been so long since I was gold