Realisation always knocks late,
followed by regrets creeping in,
ought to be carried for a long time,
destroying us little by little each day.

The greatest one I bear now,
making me die a little each day,
is that I let you go, not knowing,
leaving was a decision you'd regret.

All it took to shatter dreams',
was a compromise made to myself,
with only pure intentions and love,
but not a soul to hear them out.

Flowing tears, shed over months,
didn't take the grief along with it,
all the shame, guilt and regrets,
needed my life as the price to pay.

A burden I no longer can bear,
a guilt that holds me back,
a mistake, I wish happened different,
but must carry on till the end.

To wish for a punishment,
a way to ease the pain,
to suffer for hurting a gem,
and free me from this stain.

But maybe this is it,
to live with this burden,
pretending everything is alright,
as the guilt slowly smothers.

None of these were meant to be,
to give up the little respect for myself,
and yet to lose you completely,
along with my soul you took off with.

I would trade my life for another day,
but one with you and your smile,
I dream of it every day and night,
with a mind knowing the impossible.

Your mere existence,
brought calm to the chaos,
and was enough to still my world.

But I failed to see,
the cracks in your sky,
from the weight of your silent ache.

I asked for peace,
not knowing I sought it,
from a gentle heart already drowning.

How can I
love someone new,
when you kiss
my soul
so true?