The moment someone knows me
The moment someone sees
I exist
I am present
I am back to being me

And so I go where noone knows me
To where I'm openly not seen
To not exist for a few hours
Is such a blessing
Not to be

The way you stand
The way you sit
The way you secretly laugh for a bit
You’ve been hurt
You’ve been broken
And yet your heart is wide open
You think no one sees
You think no one cares
But that is really just not fair
Because I see
Because I do
My heart is filled by just looking at you

It may still be early
But I have already made the decision
Though I know it will hurt
To inform you of division

When my mind is made up it's final
My resolve won't waver or cave
I figured now is the time to come clean
Though that means being brave

My body is my hamartia
The fatal flaw I cannot remove
Resolve stands until your magic is worked
Then out of the way defenses move

Towards the sun my face is angled
Anything to avoid looking at
The confused expression you wear
And the damage under that

I take time to explain best as I can
Why you are not right for me
I'm sure you still don't understand
Why you must set me free

Across the lawn sun slowly rises
Tomorrow is a brand new day
No matter how bad you feel right now
Patience will take sadness away

Into the woods watch me retreat
Until my silhouette disappears
It will be easier saying goodbye now
Than to wait a few more years

Life has a sick sense of humor
Can't control my emotion
It's always the most toxic option
That arouses deep devotion

Down through the mess of sensations
One thing remains clear and true
Of all the directions inner compass is pulling
Not one of them points to you

I move real slow through this minefield
One misstep and I will be dead
Placing each foot with the utmost caution
Explosives where shoes tread

Up the rocky ***** I climb
Fumbling inch by inch
Hands utilizing grips available
Narrow handles hard to clinch

It makes more sense to let go
Can't hang on much longer
I could cradle you in my arms
If only I were stronger

I reach peak of adoration
Admitting it towers so tall
Yet when I gaze at the sights below
Simply think
"What a far ******* fall"

In solitude insanity
Stalks me like shadow
But that is not a good excuse
To lead you on I know

I stretch my words to please you
Cause I'm scared to disappoint
It's wrong of me to exaggerate
When there really is no point

And the energy connecting us
Will eventually disippate
In the future you will gaze back
And be thankful that we separate

In an even trade I'd give you my heart
And I'd get yours in return
But relationships are never equal
A harsh truth that you must learn

With all that you have done for me
It is hard to up and leave
But what else to do after realizing
I can't put forth same care I receive

And so I release you from my embrace
To fly away into the sky
Maybe I shouldn't have taken a chance
This is what happens when I try

Every person who gets too close
Gets cut by pieces broken
Whether by sharp behavior
Or musings left unspoken

I experience bliss in your presence
But remain consumed by emptiness
Probably destined to live alone forever
I don't deserve love or happiness