When I message you
It's often my young excitable loving care free baby that messages
She wants to play
To connect
To be in your world
To have you in hers
There is a naivety in this
That comes at a price
It costs me emotionally
It's up to me to love and care for my baby
To learn to keep her safe
To notice when she hurts
You remain in my heart
That causes some confusion
Makes me wonder if I've said it all
If I've been vulnerable
If I've made clear the depth of what I feel
May I lay it down
May I trust in love
Trust in my self
Trust in the mystery
And may I release control
You are my teacher
This love is a teacher
A teacher in being with what I can't control
Learning to live with love, loss, regret, beauty, hope and faith
All of it
Becoming strong enough to hold it all