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I see the tears welling up in his eyes
As he sets there, with a heavy sigh
These thoughts on his mind heavily weigh
Under his breath I could hear him say
"I'm getting so very forgetful"
"I'm looking so **** pitiful"

He turned 87 a week ago
His age is starting to show
He feels deaths grip closing in
His skin is paper thin
He's always cold even in the sweltering heat of summer
His hearing is almost gone, it's all just mummers
He talks of how his legs don't work so well any more
The act of getting up is such a chore

He has taken to cussing like a sailor
But reads the bible, getting ready to meet his creator
"Growing old in not for the weak or faint of heart
This growing old **** is hard"

©Pauline Morris
Like a fish without water, a bird without a sky
Standing on the shores of deception, wondering why

With my head in the clouds, flying so high
Drowning in reality lie after lie

Now I was smart enough to know a shark is a shark and a snake is a snake
That some people really are nothing more than fake

Despite the warnings, the signs, and the voices that raged
Willingly I flew in, to be locked up and caged

I just wanted so badly to believe in the notes of that song
I wanted to be protected, to be loved and to belong

When friendship and love is the weapon of choice
It's not only the heart but the whole being it destroys

©Pauline Morris
Close to death
A finale breath
Reaper's touch
A finale hush
Pain dissipates
In loved one's eyes reinstates
The rain it pitter patters 
Against my window splatters 
And the only thing that really matters 

Is your not here with me 
It's like the sky could see 
And started crying so soft and slowly

©Pauline Russell
The walking dead in the land of the living
Soulless eyes and hearts unforgiving

They seek to destroy
******* out your joy
Shatter your skull
Make your mind dull

Rip out your heart
That's just the start
Dead set eyes
You'll never relize
Till it's to late 
Your heart they ate

Breathing remains
Nothing else the same
Now hollow of feeling
Soul was sent reeling

Some don't know
Out of them life flowed
We're all missing parts
Mostly the heart
Also gray matter
Obscenities spatter

Growing in number
Pillage and plunder
All must be fed
Living in the land of the dead..

©Pauline Morris
I never was warned
Now I'm stuck on the horns

I'm burning in the fire
Stuck in the mire

Each choice will pierce
This decision is fierce

This situation is dire
My brain is going haywire

It's about to expire
What an awful quagmire

The universe against me is conspiring
With all it guns locked and loaded, it's firing

It's aiming straight at my heart, my head
I swear it wants me dead

Such an enigma
On the horns of a dilemma

©Pauline Russell
One loose Pebble could send me plummeting
And I feel an earthquake coming
Besides the screams and panic
Besides people becoming manic

Was the most haunting of sounds, ever to be heard
Surreal and hysterically absurd
As loved ones try to leave nothing unsaid
Was the continuously ringing cellphones of the dead

©Pauline Russell
She left on that Desert highway
Running at top speed
She didn't stop for days
She wanted to end the bleed

Took a few left turns
She found herself lost
She had watched it all burn
Her soul had paid the cost

Her wildness enthralling
As in darkness she was drown
Storms of memories falling
Screaming silence the sound

Do not try to follow
Disappearing into herself, leaving only a blur
She'd taken all she could swallow 
With this life she  never did concur

©Pauline Russell
Pauline Morris May 2018
Oxymoron

Good judgment comes from experience, experience from bad decisions
This whole ******* life is a contradiction
It's an oxymoron at every turn
Every decision only gets you burned
If in old age you manage to arrive
That's when life's lessons are realized

The young are bound in the futility of it all
Never seeing the cliff before they fall
Not wise enough to know
God clipped our wings before the throw
He turned everything upside down
When he placed us on this hellish ground

We all were marked
You can't see the light unless your in the dark
You don't appreciate the sun's rays
Till you've stood in the storm for days
Without pain you wouldn't relish the pleasure
Without work, there would be no leisure
What is good, if taken to much only leads to bad
Giving love away leaves you with more than you had
The act of forgiveness is not for the one that hurt you
But heals your soul before its through

So do the best you can in life
Even when it equals strife
For this world will keep you spinning
For the score card is plain, death is winning

But don't you worry, I'm sure that's an oxymoron too
When deaths door we pass through
Real living, then will we ensue
In death there will be no rest
This life is but a test
For the oxymoron weaves it's way through it all
Even when death, at your door calls

©Pauline Russell
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