"I am not a gifted faker like you"
I remember those words each time I see you
You said it so casually and forgot.
But never did it ever leave my heart!
To you it seemed like I could be 2 different persons
Inwardly I know how much courage it took me so.
Can I wear my heart on the sleeve for the world to see?
Is this what you want me to be, bare all for you?
Life is not been the same, since those days, I swear
I will not return to those memories of hurt again.
I fake it because, I need to make it through another day
You are here today, and somewhere else you'll be tomorrow
But I need to go on living and cannot stop for you.
You cannot take that away from me, my desire!
My dreams, my hopes, my ambitious are all I have
Paper boats and pipe dreams you may call it
But it is still my very own, my identity and a part of me
You on the other hand, outsider, stood by and smiled on
Never took the courage to dig deeper.
Shallow it may be for you
Afraid the road was steeper
A mess you never wanted to deal with
A part you never wanted to play.
Hence, I moved on, put a bright face and cheered on
Stronger you made me by your test
Till I could stand apart
from my feelings and look at it like the rest
I am fool to take you so seriously
You were having fun at my expense
Hence now, I can fake it and make believe
I can see it affects you now,
Why is it not the old me?
