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I am uncertain
can I really do this
go to college
live on my own
make my own money
be an adult
get my license
I'm not ready
everything is happening so fast
I feel disoriented
will I ever feel capable
I can't do this
it's too much
just breathe
you can do this
anxiety captures me again
I don't know if I can do this
KK Mar 11
Just like the Raven
I'm stark mad. ****.
Thinking of things,
I think you'd do.
If you were in the room.
Or in the mood.
If alcohol consumed

I'm doomed, but...
Even without your touch
****, or body above
The connection is enough
To light me up.
I wish to remain stuck
In this slippery platonic love...
Eliana Knight Mar 10
In 1983, a team of deeply pious scientists conducted a radical experiment
They found a willing volunteer with merriment
They believe a human without any senses or ways to perceive stimuli
Like what would happen when you die
Except he will be alive
He would be able to perceive the presence of God & survive
They theorized that the five senses clouded our awareness of eternity
And live in the mind sempiternity
There a human could actually establish contact with God by thought
The only one to volunteer was Scott
His wife passed away, he has no family, so he decided to give this a shot
To purge him of all his senses, the scientists performed a complex operation
Scott was heavily under sedation
When every sensory nerve connection to the brain was surgically severed
There was no going back, ever
Although Scott would retained full muscular function, his speech may be impaired
When he awoke he could not see, hear, taste, smell, or feel, & felt scared
He realized he was not, with the ramifications, fully prepared
But it was too late, its permanent, never to be repaired
With no possible way to communicate
All he could do was wait
With no sense the outside world, he was alone
He began to cry and moan
Scientists monitored him as he spoke aloud about his state of mind
He spoke of flashing light, though he was blind
In jumbled, slurred sentences that he couldn’t even hear
He felt in a in closed in a tomb & spoke of fear
Assuming it was an onset of psychosis, they paid little attention to Scott’s concerns
The next few days, he’d lose consciousness & then mumble as he returns
On the fourth day, Scott was unknowingly lying on a bed
When he claimed to be hearing hushed, unintelligible voices in his head
Then he heard a voice, it was Kimberly his wife & although she was dead
He cried out, that he could hear his dead wife speaking with him
And even more, he could communicate back to Kim
The scientists were intrigued, but were not convinced
Until Scott started naming dead relatives of the scientists, that they could not dismiss
He repeated personal information that only their dead family member would have known
Some of the things he said freaked them out & sent a chill to the bone
So a sizable portion of scientists left the study
The only ones left were Ronan, Judie, Stefan and Buddy
A week of conversing with the deceased through his thoughts, Scott
became distressed
Saying the voices were overwhelming, making it hard for him to rest
In every waking moment, his consciousness was bombarded by so many voices
They refuse to leave him alone, even with his wife he no longer rejoices
He frequently threw himself against the wall, trying to elicit a pain response
While the scientists were nonchalance
He begged the scientists for sedatives, pleading and weeping
So he could escape the voices by sleeping
It worked for 3 days, until he started having severe night terrors & woke up screaming
Scott repeatedly said that he could see & hear the deceased even when dreaming
Only a day later, Scott began to shout & claw at his non-functional eyes
hoping to sense something in the physical world, but the scientists did not empathize
The hysterical Scott now said the voices of the dead were deafening
Speaking of hell, the end of the world, their voices were strengthening
At one point, he yelled “No heaven, no forgiveness” for five hours straight
He continually begged to be killed, but the scientists decided to wait
They were convinced that he was close to establishing contact with God
Seemingly mad, at his flesh he started to bite chunks & clawed
The scientists rushed into the test chamber & restrained him to a table
With the restraints, to hurt himself further or attempt to **** himself, he will be unable
For two weeks, Scott had to be manually rehydrated due to the constant crying
They were so close & couldn’t risk him dying
After another day, Scott could no longer form coherent sentences or even a word
It was all very blurred
After a few hours in restraints, Scott halted his struggling & screaming, he was silent
The scientists came closer to Scott since he was no longer violent
To check his vitals and if he wakes up what's the first thing he will say
But he was still silent, until the next day
He was staring at the ceiling as though someone watching the stars in space
Then teardrops silently streaked across his face
Eventually, he turned his head & despite his blindness, made eye contact
The scientists didn’t even know how to react
“I have spoken with God, and he has abandoned us” Scott said with his last breathe
Then his vital signs stopped, there was no apparent cause of death.


Based On An Urban Legend
Only Based On An Urban Legend
Jacob Mar 3
Would you offer your throat till the white roses run red
Would you tilt your neck till it mimics the gallows bite
Would you arch your back while my fingers grip you like the rack
Shoulders of a beast set to prowl
Distance met by a jump of static
Graze along sanguine thrum
Intoxicant for syringe canine
Moment to savor before the plunge
Pour in my mouth
Lap at the slice
Nails coffin, sign your song to my back
Only the moon plays observer
Voiceless the scream
Mirror the clouding heavens light
Cherish the life that flows from you
Glee it fills in me
Edge to the end, the final drip
From my arms, to the ground do you slip
Inspiration taken from the first line of the esteemed Meat Loaf's "You Took the Words Right Out of My Mouth"
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