i want to be seen
i want someone to tell me i am beautiful
i want them to mean it
i don't want them to feel obligated to tell me
i want someone to love me too
i want it to be pure love
i don't want it to be an impure *** based love
but most of all i want a friend
i want a friend who will pick up the phone at 2 in the morning
i dont want a friend who turns around and leaves me in my darkest hours alone to cry by myself.

I thought that you would be the one
You put images I wanted down
You had the power to make me smile
You had the skill to make me frown
I loved the flowers you gave
Even if they were brown

Too bad our legs untangled
Our hands no longer hold
The future I once thought I saw
Are but memories that now thaw
Like ice under the sun
Dripping in puddles of flaws

This is what a Lover means
What “could have been”
What would never be
No longer what is and what will be
I move forward with you
Lingering faintly —
In the recesses of my memory

This is what a Lover means
Awkward, silent, cruel
Having gruel
With a fork and knife
Grey and slippery, sloshing in a bowl
A trial to all

You could have been my present and my future
My boyfriend, husband, lover
But now you are no longer
I will not wait for you hence
Not now, not ever.


This is what a Lover is,
You are but a Lover,
Not made to be my forever.