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It’s weird how one vaguely remembers important days,
Like a friend’s birthday.
But I’ll remember one day,
And no, it wasn’t my friend’s birthday,
But actually, it was mother’s day.
I’ll always remember it,
Because you said you were cooking for your mom
And I remember thinking:
“What a gentleman!”
I’ll remember it because you were at church that day,
And I laughed because the idea of you being at church,
Made me believe for a while that you were actually a “Good boy”- a gentleman.
Most of all though,
I’ll remember that day,
Because you practically asked me If I liked you.
I remember saying to myself: “He’s a genius!”
Because you twisted it up,
But to be frank, I would have done the same thing too.
Instead of saying : “Do you like me ?” – (like a normal being);
You asked : “Is there a boy that you currently like?”
I also remember thinking ,
“How awkward”
Because my feelings for you were as clear as the sea,
But here you are asking, if I liked you.
I’ll remember that day, because I imagined how misty the smoke would look as it forced its way out of your lungs,
After a deep inhalation of the one you called: “Marie”
I’ll remember creating scenes in the desert of my mind
Of how it would feel to meet you for the first time –
if you’d hug me and smile,
Like a gentle man.
I’ll remember that day because I kept wondering:
“What if our first encounter was bad? “
“What if he doesn’t like what he sees?” –
I remember laughing because thought it was funny.
I’ll remember thinking that I should stop building feelings for you so fast.
I’ll remember it because I made my imaginations get the better of me –
I imagined us in the place where my only use for that place is to sleep.
I’ll remember that day because trying to get you off my mind failed once more-
Because when I fell asleep you were at the forefront of my mind
And when I woke up,
You still were.
 Jun 2014 pluie d'été
Paula Lee
This is the second time in a month
I have cried so much today
Going through your things
deciding what to keep,
what to throw away?

It's like there's memories
attached to every single thing
Do I keep the china?
What about your wedding ring?

It's only been thirty days
I wasn't prepared for the extra pain
Throwing your Life away
Is like losing you all over again!
I'm being pushed to do this and I'm just not ready!
 Jun 2014 pluie d'été
aj
dove song
 Jun 2014 pluie d'été
aj
a caged dove sits on its perch,
and listens to its own silent song.
while the veiled sun ascended to its throne of flames
and gave rise to its free wings.

***** filled the air
and all the while a new song chimed on
like a call unanswered.
as the dove listened, it began to hum;
their tunes began to intertwine.
all the while the dove thought:
that song sounds like mine
Maybe we all need a little release..
 Jun 2014 pluie d'été
aj
I.
i kept my eyes off.
turning to face away,
as if god might have tapped me on the shoulder,
and told me to let my love smolder.
my eyes followed the distractions,
as they beat on marimbas,
and as i kept his gaze,
it started to feel like
they were beating
my ribcage

II.
heartbeat altered,
i began to falter.
moving my sight from the dancing mallets,
to my lukewarm palms,
that seemed to tear in passion.
in a sudden fashion,
i raised his head
and looked straight at it
with its wary eyes closed,
and i thought,
that i might have heard,
with a rush of raising concerns,
a heart shatter in shallow nearness,
like a shaky hand might have dropped a crystal.

III.
after the shatter,
my heart began to patter,
at a faster tempo in spite of the latter.
it is because of this,
that i promised to never looked again.
Watched someone while attending a percussion ensemble showcase...
 Jun 2014 pluie d'été
aj
******.
a choir of omens
that fly on wings of death,
and soar on winds of agony.
harbingers of oncoming storms:
what lies beneath cacophonous cackles?

solace in the chains of sorrow.
We all have those feelings....
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