i cant fill the void, i cant pick up the pieces
they have been destroyed.
the world is cruel, my glass is half full, of *****.
trying to dround out all of the worlds negativity.
the demons screaming inside of me.

i am cynical, and mental, i have been abused.
i think i'm paranoid, i am so
damaged, restless, reckless and confused.

i have become completly mad,
i live alone, broken i rant and roam,
this darkness is the only light i've ever really had.

http://youtu.be/tA1Y5mDf1u0?list=UU-FknAV2u4kdfHyCB75_2jw

i've married you in my mind, atleast a million times,
and in this dream of mine, you wear a black suit and boe tye.

last night i couldnt sleep so i turned on the tv, but just counted
the freckles on your back, and drifted off into fantasy.

i wanted to tell you how you look like an angel when you sleep,
lying next to you my kneese get weak, i'm in so deep. head above water.

and just so you know, i'll never let go, come what may you'l always be my favorite hello.

you're my partner in crime, you're my favorite addiction, you are the love of my life, forever you'l be my  one and only, just stay by my side, i know that this life is like a rollar coaster ride, but as long as 'm alive, you dont have to be lonely. and i'll be okay as long as you're here to hold me.

when your heart is filled with fright,
but you scream with delight,
you know that it must be halloween night!

shattered, my mind scattered, and permanently bruised,
i have come to this conclusion, i refuse, to be abused, or
used, if you want to walk away, i will not run after you,
i refuse to follow, i will not weep, i will not woe, i will not
live in sorrow.

i will not forgive, i will not forget, all of your harsh words, all of the struggle and regret, i will not be a door mat, you've added to this tremendous  weight on my shoulder, making it colder, weighing me down like a boulder, and as i grow older, i've become too wise to take it, i've realised my self worth, and this not what i deserve, i will enjoy my time on this earth, i now know life is what you make it.


i had love for you, but you betrayed my trust, turning it to ashes and down, filling me with insecurity, making me feel worthless, and unworthy, but i know now that i don't deserve this, and the harsh reality is that you don't deserve me.

He called me beautiful.
"You're so beautiful", said he.
It should have been sweet,
a compliment to flow off one's tongue,
but I knew what he wanted.

His lustful lies are empty
to my delicate heart.
I know better than to fall
for the charming prince
with the beautiful words.

i am
unvaluble,
vunerable, easily replacable,
broken, scarred,
and damaged,this is too hard.
i can not manage.

i am
a mess, a tragedy, a living breathing catastrophe,
and nobody can save me, maybe i should **** myself,
i dont think that anyone would blame me.

i am
a ghost of the happy girl i used to be,
i lost all of my friends, and somehow i
cant stop making enemys.
i have been destroyed by stress and insecurity.