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I am told that the first love
should hold a special place
within the heart.

Tucked away, sheltered
in a mysterious compartment.

When I thought of those days,
I would plead my mind to turn off that switch,
so I do not have to remember
the first love.

Seeing those days filled
with a certain joy indescribable
to the untrained soul,
I ask my mind to free me
from such shackles.

But I realize that my mind
is not seeking to torture.
I see those days filled with
warm embraces, encased
by grace and interlaced
with every place
we shared together.
I see these memories,
so short and sweet,
and I realize a first love
does not need to hurt.

So when my mind decides
to reopen that small compartment,
I feel a new love.
One that is nostalgic, reminiscent
of a great story,
and nothing more.
Something that can only be described
as a first love.
.
whenever you feel
inconsequentially small
remember one thing:
the period.

a dark pixel
a tiny nuanced dot
that manages to
transform everything.

"I'm fine"
becomes "I'm fine."
"Okay"
becomes "Okay."

but perhaps the most painful
of all is to see
"goodbye"
change into "goodbye."
it's over...
 Jun 2014 Sheila J Sadr
r
Painted ponies of the Paiute
Run against the sky
Cracked lightning lights the orange fire
Desert winds stoke whipping flame
Eagle flies blind to the sun
Scorpion strikes out in vain
Antelope leap crisscrossed arroyo
Coyote calls across the sand
Thatched huts explode in maelstrom storm
First People’s shadows smoke the ground
Clay pots crack and break in time
Fire-cracked stone in communal circles
Markers of forgotten stories
Great Basin parched to cracking lines
Full moon wanes to yellow bone
Awaiting dark clouds quenching rain
And painted ponies once again.

r ~ 6/4/14
\•/\
   |     All in a dream...
  / \
In Welsh
The word "Hiraeth" means
A homesickness for a home
To which you cannot return.
A home which maybe never was.
The nostalgia,
The yearning,
The grief for the lost places of your past.

In Russian
The word "Toska" means
A dull ache of the soul.
A longing with nothing to long for.
A sick pining.
A vague restlessness.

In Yaghan
The word "Mamihlapinatapai" means
A look shared by two people,
Each wishing that the other will
Offer something that they both desire
But are unwilling to suggest or offer themselves.

You say that you love my words
And wonder why I have such a passion for them.
It's simple, really.
I'm merely trying to put a name
To everything you inspire me to feel.
10w
How can you feel that
and
     not
         want
                to
                  write?
it is like
all my words
will fall short
and everything
i say will
not do me
justice
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