it's hard for me sometimes,
getting out of bed,
just to be dragged back into the dark.
thoughts,
thoughts,
blank spaces.
it's hard for me sometimes,
telling you what's really wrong,
when i don't know myself.
please don't get mad at me,
i'm trying,
but the dark is soo comforting.
it's hard for me sometimes,
because i don't want it to be about me,
but i make it about me.
i'm sorry,
i'm sorry,
please forgive me.
it's hard for me sometimes,
when i can't be there for you,
i feel you growing more distant.
i'm sorry,
it's my fault,
i deserve this.
it's hard for me sometimes,
to not think of the bad, inviting thoughts,
to keep them at bay with your words.
that's why i need your reassurance,
your love,
your words even though you have told me a million times.
it's hard for me sometimes,
when you push me away,
i'm not used to that.
i love you,
i want you,
but priorities, right?
please don't forget me!
i swear i'm doing you a favor,
you'll thank me later.
that sinking feeling. losing you. i don't want to lose you. but it's okay. someone else deserves you, not me.