I walk across
to Hannah's flat
in Arrol House
and knock at the door

Mrs Scott opens
the door and stands there
she's a short thin woman
with a face of granite
with a slit
where her mouth is

whit is it?
she says
her Scottish accent
rough as stone

is Hannah home?
I ask

I dunnae kinn
she replies
HANNAH
she bellows
over her shoulder
Benedcit is haur fur ye
she adds
scowling at me

jist coming
Hannah replies
from back in the flat

yoo'll hae tae bide
Mrs Scott says

and walks back inside
leaving me
on the red tiled step

I look into the interior
of the flat
and smell breakfast
having been cooked

I look back
into the Square
kids are playing
near by
on the pram sheds
and over by the wall
girls are doing handstands
their feet
against the wall
dresses falling
over their heads
showing underwear

sorry about Mum
she has a mouth on her
Hannah says
where we going?
she asks

thought we'd go
to the South Bank
see the Thames and boats
and have ice cream
I say

do I need money?
she asks

just about 2/-
I say
for bus fares
and ice cream

I'll ask Mum
for a handout
but wait for the answer

Mum have you 2/-
I can have?
Hannah asks

fa dae ye hink
Ah am Rockerfeller?
nae Ah huvnae
her mother replies

no problem
I say to Hannah
I'll have enough
for us both

are you sure?

yes don't aggravate
your mother more
than you have to

so Hannah gets her coat
and we walk off
through the Square

she's like that sometimes
Hannah says
she's as tight
as a wing nut

we walk down the *****
and up Meadow Row

I ask her how her father is

she says
he's Ok but in
the doghouse more often
as not with Mum
but he's a softy
to Mum's hardness
but Mum says
he's soft in the heed
but he's lovely really
Hannah says

-I know her old man
he's English and a bit
simple after helping
to empty out Belsen camp
in 1945 where some
he told me were
more dead as alive-

we wait at the bus stop
she with her dark hair
pony tailed
with a tartan skirt
and white blouse
and me in blue jeans
and white shirt
and quiff of brown hair
and hazel eyes

she with a budding beauty
with her mother's
touch of tongue
who if roused
could give words
full lung.

Oh I wish I could win the Lottery
And own a home of my own
Where I no longer need Social Security
Or feel always in need of a loan.

Oh I wish I'd no need to count pennies
And that Christmas came every day
That 'Housing Benefit' were ***** words
And bills  - a delight to pay!

Yet I may not have two brass farthings
My bank account won't reach double figures
At least I walk around with a smile
My personal wealth brings on the sniggers.

Oh I might never be Rockerfeller
As my bank account continually drains
There's rarely a glimmer of sunshine
It never pours, but constantly rains.

I can't confess to NOT being happy
And I'm wealthier than I appear
I've still got all my marbles,
Fish and chips, telly and beer!

So I'll continue to draw Social Security
Until the right position can be found
But I won't ditch my dreams or my wishes
So each week, I'll still pay my pound!!!

Fifth avenue is dressed in her finery
her shop windows glistening
Her Rockerfeller Center tree stands with ohhs and ahhs around
Her daughter was excited
Her mother didn't have the heart to take her to American Girl or FAO Schwartz
The money wasn't there
This young mother was not dressed warmly but her little girl was
New York City has a magic all her own
A beautifully dressed woman with three little girls in tow gave the little girl a bag
Happy Holidays she cried out as she and her children were whisked away in a car
The bag said American ******* it and it was full
In and out the door
Seasons Greetings and be grateful for others don't have what you take for granted

c@rainbowchaser2019

In that very moment
In instance if you noticed
A Teddy bear that is a cherished gift
Chestnuts and the Rockerfeller Center Christnas tree
A friend who became best friend and love of your life
He gave you his last name and did not mind if you kept yours next to his
Just one look with hugs that still greet you daily
A kiss you can still taste years later
Driving just for the sake of spending time together with no place to go
And then it happens
And then it happens
You are loved your whole life long
There is nobody else that will do

C@rainbowchaser2021

The Holiday tree and Rockerfeller Center
Eating chestnuts while walking and looking at the Fifth avenue December windows
Seeing a Broadway a show in person and walking to the Theater marquees
Hugging and seeing friends
Attending Television tapings and enjoying restaurants while sitting indoors with no fear or consequences
Many truths are becoming evident and we must move forward and get out of the past befote it destroys us further

Shopping at Farmers markets outdoors
My sweetheart's birthday is paused like our great city but we will celebrate him as best we can
We have great photographs and memories of trips to enjoy but looking forward to more of these and gathering with those we love

C@rainbowchaser2020