4/2/2019
To no one do I owe.
With no one do I unite.
If I begin to feel unfit,
To my image I hold.
Somehow I feel it must go.
But I'm gripping so tight,
My fists closed shut.
What do I hold?
I need to know,
Is this alright?
Please tell me what,
But what do I hold?
I fear that tomorrow
Won't be better than tonight,
Is it even possible to let,
Let go of what I hold?
It's not helping my sorrow,
It's not helping my sight.
I feel so inadequate,
Is it useless, what I hold?
It could be so,
That with which all my might-
Not another minute!
Tell me, is it nothing that I hold?
Don't tell me to throw,
All in which I delight.
It's my life, my habit,
All that I hold!
Please, I can't say no,
And return to the light!
It's wrenching my gut,
Still, I must hold!
If this is all to blow,
Away into the night,
Must I forget,
All that I now hold?
God, if you say so,
You know my petty plight,
You see that I am delicate,
Take what I hold!
God, I fear what will follow,
But you overtake my fright,
Please don't quit,
Go! You say to what I hold.
God, you are not slow,
You destroy all that is not right.
God, I can't bear it,
Now, what do I hold?!?
God, I need to grow,
Don't leave me falling in midflight!
I am still so desperate,
Without anything to hold.
Yes, my own ladder was worth zero,
And it's reach to heaven finite.
But now that it's been cut,
There's nothing else to hold.
God, make me your shadow,
I will be your satellite.
The entire time, I must admit,
It was you I needed to hold.
I am no longer hollow,
My future is bright.
With you as my magnet,
And when to you I hold.
And when you I borrow,
You take the spotlight.
I struggle, but humbly take the exit,
Oh, what now do I hold!