I just need to tell someone I want to die, then hold hands and take a walk.

I post a picture,
I laugh, I smile,
I subconsciously lose myself for a while,
I look at the person,
I'm desperate to be,
Hiding behind that smile,
The smile for the screen,
I post a picture,
I cry, I sob,
Looking at the girl,
I was once reminded off,
For I am no longer,
That ******* the screen,
That girl is no longer what I'm destined to be.

as my eyes roll to the back of my head,
I gain clarity
and tell myself-

“the Earth only spins in one direction;
no amount of delinquency
will ever
give you the power
to change that.”