Another night fell,
but it doesn't matter.
I never knew the sun anyway...

Insane and weird* -- some may think of me.
Shattered and useless -- others may think of me.
But I am what I am -- *different!

I open my eyes and see you the way I want to.
I close them, and I see the way you truly are....

Sometimes I wish to be the rain.
To be careless and free, and feel no pain.
To guide someone, and be their inspiration.
To bring two souls, hugged, under one umbrella,
To have them be filled with a much loving sensation,
And have their hearts sing a long-lasting a capella.

The night falls
and so do I,
in the dark pits
of your eyes...

Dot. Dot. Dot.
Dotted became the sky.
Dotted with stars that
Dance and flicker. But I can't
Dance with them, as well...

The flames dance
just as our hearts did
when we met by chance
in the giant crowd amid.

But now the wave brings
all the sight of you
and the sky sings
a song we once knew.

Asleep at forest's edge,
I dream of sky islands and starry paths.
Counting the cycles of rebirth,
I dream of never-ending destinies.

Asleep at cavern's end,
I dream of grassy mornings.
Counting the passing nights,
I dream of death...

Others may read what I write,
but I write for you...

I will await you where the sidewalk ends;
listening to the rain tap upon the cobblestones.
Sheltered in the darkness under a black umbrella
as the cold, autumn wind tickles my bones.

You will find me sitting upon a marble bench
behind the splendor of a willow tree.
And its fallen leaves will keep me company
as they did to those who waited here before me.

Like waveless water I am.
Static; unchanging.
Nothing. Nothing ever changes within me.
But, empty I am not.
I am not empty, I have pain.
And pain it may be, it is still with and within me.
And though hurt me it may, I am not alone and I am not empty.
And I will never, ever, give it up!
For it is the sole thing which tells me, that I am...
Alive...

In the magic of the dark I am lost.
And though alone I am here,
lonely I am not,
for I feel its beauty around me.
No, I, create that beauty.
I paint the dark, the brushstrokes,
leaving a trail of darker shades in their wake.
I paint portraits of nature and of mesmerizing beauty.
And... I stare at them, for it is all I can do.
I watch the trees I paint grow and the flowers bloom,
and I watch the mountains break and the clouds move.
But rain does not fall for I feel no droplets of water touch me,
nor do I hear them...
The rocks too... they are sturdy and sharp, I see them so,
but upon my touch they turn to weightless air.
And... I stand in silence, for it is all I can do.
Though lonely I may not be here,
alone I certainly am,
for the beauty I so desperately want, wants me not...

A shadow walked beneath the streetlight
When the night was dark, with no moonlight.
And as the shadow watched how the stars glittered brightly
They too peeked at it ever-so-slightly.
"I know 'tis my color which frightens you most,
when I walk the nights not as pale as a ghost,
but as dark as the night sky would be without you;
a blackness not even you can peer through."
Bellowed the shadow at the stars.

Many moments of still silence passed.
The shadow only stared at the sky so vast
and waited for the star's responding taunt.
But they remained somewhat nonchalant.
"Are you not angered by what I dare utter?
Have you no words you wish to sputter?
Has the night chained you like a mindless slave?
Have you already dug your own grave?"
And waited the shadow, for answers which never came.


"Have you too grown weary of this old me,
have you too decided to leave; to flee?
Nay, that is untrue, I still see you here,
though dim you are I beg you not to disappear."
Asked and begged the shadow.
"Because who then shall I ever vex,
while I live enshrouded by this wretched hex?"
In displeasure spat the shadow.

"I see you fading back into your abyss,
now all that is left for me is to leave and reminisce.
Then I shall return when once again the moon is no more,
for she is the one I most certainly wish to ignore."
The shadow dissipated, waiting to come another night.

No longer caught between the chapters of your dream,
No more distant feelings, we are in unity,
Like a hive of bees and these feelings the queen,
We are now playing a perfect symphony...

A tulip in a field of roses gazes into me
With uncertainty and with passion.

Her dazzling lips steal my gasp,
As though I was stabbed
By a sword forged in wonder.

Her hair is like woven moonlight,
Her caress is like sweet honey,
And her voice the light in my darkness.

My thoughts go numb at her sight
As the solemn silence breaks free,
And I only wish to hold her
Like the candle holds its flame.

A hallow gaze meets me halfway
On the path from somewhere to nowhere.
She's dressed in colors, in a world of gray.
I simply see her, now here, then there...

Like a mirage, created by my needs,
Like a goddess, that listens to my pleads,
She's like a raven that whispers "nevermore",
She's like the wishful peace, in times of war.

I only wish to see her in my dreams or in reality,
I do not care where, as long as she's next to me.
In this world of monochrome, she is an abnormality.
She simply is... like a land at sea...

Lost, I walk through the ruins of the found,
A mirrored false hope entangled around
The blinding light far in the distance,
Poisoned and tainted its existence.

I begged and prayed, but no one was there,
Now I'm frightened, like a mouse in a dragon's lair.
The darkness has reached the roots of my world,
It's coming for me, with its vortex all curled.

Like the dying breath of a candle flame
My dreams vanish alongside my name.
I've long-realised there is no rebirth,
So now I only drown myself in this soiled earth.

The hollow night awakens
As I breathe the monochrome.
It will all be over soon I say,
All I need to do is have the will
To wait for only a little while,
The morning will surely come.
But I wonder, Will it be my last?
Will my heart be frozen in time?
There is nothing to cut this silence.
All which surrounds me is as dull
As the edge of the overused blade of life.
The horror thickens as even the last
Piece of whiteness turns to black.
I feel as though I'm drowning in mud,
It fills my lungs and I lose myself
With each passing moment.

She holds the light, tender in her hands,
In mixed colors her eyes glimmer
The fusion of water and desert sands.

Her hair a velvet made of sunshine,
Her mouth extends, forms a smile
Touching cheeks as red as wine.

Skin so soft, so warm but pale,
Distant memories sadden her face
On which fallen tears have left a trail.

Our love is a vortex of souls,
Tormented, tattered, torn.
Recreated, rejuvenated,
Then tortured once again.

Nothing but whispers of melancholy,
Depression, despair, disaster.
Menacing, morbid
Are our nights spent in the dirt.

I hate you, yet I love you
Sincerely, silently, secretly.
Forlorn, forgotten,
Your smile, like an illusion of the past.

The road strings up day and night
Upon my only shoelace.
Twenty four hours with no rest
I walk only to see your face.

Blaming others for your loss is admitting that you're weak

We act grown up, but we're only the universe's babies...

I was always there for you
And you weren't for me.
But I didn't care, not at all.
No matter how dark your
Days would get, I would
Always try to light them up.
Even though I knew I'd fail,
Even though I knew it was futile....
I did it. I did it and I would do it again,
But in a matter of days you changed
And you pushed me away. You tried
To throw me out of your life and succeeded.
But why?!

The morning was there, shinning like  
Freshly smithed iron. And I, I
Was in my room, tightly gripping a knife...

The window opened and I saw  
A cat brush against the wooden frame.
"Still the same, still the same" I heard it  say.

"Let me be, and just let me die.
I beg to have the last moments
Of my life; to do so in solitude."

"Fool... still the same..." I heard it say.
Its eyes looked at me as though the void
Was staring at me with its emptiness.

"Leave, ****** cat. All I knew is wrong,
All I had is now gone. I am...
Empty... so tell me why I am a fool."

"All you knew may be wrong, but all  
You did not may be right. Why turn a
Circle into a half one? Tell me why."

"I don't understand you demon, go,
Leave  me, let me die alone, let me
Be at last, at peace. I wish only for that..."

"Still the same, still the same" I heard it say
"Why run and get tired, when you can walk
And feel at ease, and have strength for later?"

"Leave me, whatever you are, leave me
And let me die. I do not understand
Your riddles, and words as empty as my soul."

"You do as others have done, you fail as
Others have failed. Like a cockroach you
Search for the darkness in the light."

"Go away, I am no petty insect... I am less,
A virus, a virus that only kills others and
Not itself. Now leave and let me die alone."

"Blood will not spill your sins,  steel will
Not end your grief. No death will bring life.
And no darkness will escape the light. Now see..."

The morning was there, shinning like
Freshly smithed iron. And I, I
Was in my room, tightly gripping a knife...

In endless mist buried.
I die to see you again....

All perceived as whole is unwhole without you near me.

Death is eternal.
We Fear it,
We hold it,
We embrace it,
But we can never,
Truly face it.

The darkness creeps in,
And light is no more.
No keys in this room
Not even a door.

Fear not for all's well,
The demons will leave
So please be patient
You'll no longer grieve

In my dreams I find a sanctuary,
Beside stones of shattered amethyst.
Lighted, by the blood red moon.

I watch them glitter brightly,
And absorb my inner thoughts.
I indulge, in the essence of tranquility.

My suffering fades from within,
As I lose myself in a world of solitude.
I wish, to never leave this lonely place.

Like worms in dirt we burrow
Our faces and expressions
We force them to dwell there.
We make that our obsession.

We know how fragile they are,
Yet we make them fight their way out.
Then we wonder why they're broken
Like eggs when they surface about.

Then yet again we do the same,
And plead them to survive unhurt,
Even though we know they are
Buried inside our bodies' dirt.