We have a lot of made up, Hallmark type of Holidays don't we? We have so many things we are told we have to celebrate our whole lives. May is here - Mother's Day is here. But what about the dirt-bag mothers? What about the mothers who don't care about their children? What about the mothers who gave their kids up?
I know it's selfish- it's childish- but you weren't there when I needed you. You were drowning in a bottle of ***** in your bathtub. I know it's selfish- it's childish- but you still haven't been there. You are too busy living in your own issues to remember you have children unless it suits you.
I remember living with dad and my stepmom- she raised me. I remember grandma helping us with homework- she raised me. I remember calling my dad when I was sad- he raised me. I remember asking you where you were after 6 months of not hearing from you - but you couldn't even answer that question.
After years of picking up pieces and telling people I didn't have a mother here I am. I am 25 years old with a stable job and stable home. You are 47 with nothing to your name except some **** and a broke down apartment you get free from the government. I am 25 with my **** together- paying my own bills- working for a living. You are 47 taking pain pills as if your life depended on them.
I hear a lot of people telling me to forgive you, but I am just now coming to terms with how messed up I am. I hear people telling me " that's your mom" but I am just now realizing the extent of my mental problem you have left me with.
All I have to say is thank the world for my father and stepmom and grandmother-- the only family I ever needed no thanks to you.