i am sorry,
that i drank your words up
like you were some kind of infatuating bottle of forever.
i am sorry,
that i used my ears as lungs
to inhale all of your problems
and exhale my advice,
knowing that the second your cancer took over my mind
and i could no longer breathe anymore
you would go away
and look for your next victim to intoxicate.
i am sorry, that i cut into my chest
and ripped out ever last living flower in me,
just to see you smile for a second
and i am sorry,
that i let you become so obsessed with the fact that
i was willing to give you the best parts of me
so that you could put yourself back together again.
because i know, that if you had a chance
to give me the same pill of love that i gave you,
you would pack it full of your selfish ambitions
and tell me to drink it down with a glass of self-destruction.
because you didn't care the way i did
and you didn't love the way i did
and i said i would take a bullet for you
but i am sorry.
i am so sorry,
that i let you pull the trigger
and use me as your target practice.