This empty feeling
Of pouring misery in moon’s cup
Each night
Gaslighting myself with ‘love’
The rope I was holding onto
Turned out to be just a thread
A trap for my conscience
To fall over my head
Slender, shaking legs
Walking fearfully to shut the window
Starving for light
Tucked my head in the same cold pillow
I am too young to give up
Too old to carry the weight
Too scared of death
Too weak in the hands of fate
I feel like falling deeper
Each step, deeper than before
Smiling to dodge reality
Why do I keep wanting more?