I love you
I meant it when I said it
Communication is important
I told you that, so that there wouldn't be any rash decisions made
so that you knew any problem could be fixed by talking it out
but its too late now
you left, gone
if you just told me what was bothering you
we could've worked it out, right?
I tried, I really tried to work it out
it seemed like you didn't though
Almost like you were sick of me already
now I can't sleep
I'm crying silently, watching the hours tick by
missing you

if you love something let it go, if it comes back it is yours forever, if it doesn't it was never yours to begin with
funny, how that works huh.
I wonder if this applies to people, because you let me go, and I came running back, I guess that means I'm yours forever right?
but when I let you go, you disappeared, never to be seen again....
so let me get  this straight *******, I'm yours forever and you were never mine to begin with? Ha what a cruel joke to play.
No you know what I'm changing this game
*If you love someone, keep fighting for them, love them how they deserve to be loved and if you don't love someone don't pretend you do

hey you okay?
I'm fine
just dandy
no reason why I wouldn't be
are you sure?
no
Yeah, totally, I'm fine
you wouldn't care either way
your just curious, you can't help
I'm just tired
Okay, Just making sure, you know I'm here for you right?
no, your not, you can't be there at 4:21 am when I'm breaking down...
Oh yeah Totally, talk to you later okay?
Yeah of course, see ya!*
no one actually cares, they don't want to know, I'm tired thats true, but I'm the kind of tired that never goes away I'm the kind of tired that makes me want to go to sleep and never wake up, I'm the kind of tired that makes me numb. I'm an unfixable,  explosion of tired that should't even be alive

What was I expecting?
That you suddenly knew how to handle me at my worst?
That you suddenly were able to tell when I was feeling depressed and that you'd be able to cheer me up?
I knew I shouldn't have expected anything, but I thought you cared...
how stupid of me, I know no one cares, but I hoped that you did
how can anyone make me better, I'm stuck, all by myself
you said you would be there for me, I should've known better
when you said you'd be there, you meant when it was convenient for you
I'm sorry, this is all my fault
I'll just say here, staring at my wall, numb
my mind drifting off to all the failures of my past and all the horrible futures of tomorrow.

I can't focus
I can't think
I can't feel

I can't do this
I can't breathe.

Am I still alive?
I need to feel something.
I need to feel something.

silver to red
silver to red
If I need to feel, i'll do my magic trick and turn silver to red

I need to, they don't understand
they hid it, but my voices are chanting "silver to red, silver to red"
Now they are screaming, " You're pathetic, you loser, you can't do anything right."

I don't feel anything, I'm numb.
but words still hurt.
I'm sobbing, curled up in the corner begging "Stop!".

But they just keeps getting louder, screaming, drowning me out.
they wants me to suffer, but then again they are me.
It's all just in my head, but they are all still so real

They taunt, They yell, They keeps me up all night.
Reminds me of mistakes, failures, my flaws
They crushes my dreams ,one by one, "who'll love you, how are you going to become a doctor" the list goes on and on

So if I just get silver
if I can just do the magic once more
then maybe I'll get some relief.

life
lif
li
lie
lies