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 Dec 2015 MOTV
Red Fox
Who Am I
 Dec 2015 MOTV
Red Fox
Who I thought I was:
Flawless
Who I was:
Flawed
Who I think I am:
Something
Who I am:
Nothing
Who I want to be:
Amazing
Who I will be:
*Me
 Dec 2015 MOTV
Afrodita Nestor
One we are
When our story finds its way
through the labyrinth of
Endless puzzles
We put together
Just to lose our way
One we are and yet we are not

Same we are
Though different by the laws
We devise to protect
The broken mind
That once was soul
Same we are and yet we are not

Whole we are
And still divided into pieces
More than stars
the sky could ever hold
If you count them all
Whole we are and yet we are not
Copyright Afrodita Nestor
 Dec 2015 MOTV
Ayeshah
I don't like what I see
when I look in the mirror
  I stand there holding myself*

Sometimes I'll place  my hands on my hips
and move from side to side
turning this way or that
grabbing at my behind
pulling it up
seeing how it'd look
if it were plumper
like them girl's in the videos


Sometimes I grab a handful of my belly
or **** it in and see how I'd look
if I could just get over this 14 year baby weight
and all the pounds
I've gained from my last few miscarriages.


I know stress plays a role
I eat when stressed
  I eat my depression and eat when sad or on my cycle
I love to eat and love food
but it's truly never been my reason for this weight
burdening me down


I lost my will to move
to walk or work out
lost my drive to fight or even speak out
I went from working and going to school
staying busy
to doing only bits here and there that I have to do


I can't  be bothered
don't even want to
I'll lay here and not move
long as I can


I've stayed in a runt for so long
I'm talking years felt so low
and haven't dug our yet
and I know for me
this depressions a killer
it's got me defeated
beaten down
so low I never wanna be loved again...


As I  stand in front of this mirror
I hate what's become of me
my pessimistic behavior
and ideology of what love should be
seems like its not meant for me
I hate looking at myself
I hate seeing my luscious curves
my ample succulent *******


I only currently
like my long hair
that goes to my shoulders
for this chocolate cocoa skin
it seems so out of place
people wonder if its a weave
and not my own
but this is all home grown
yet and still

I just like who I am as a person & represent
not my physical appearance
not only because I have a "good hair"
for a black girl
  I'm ONLY black
yet
I'm proud of my heritage
I'm black and Puerto Rican
but who cares


Funny how my shape for others
is just right
&
for me it isn't
I don't have that j.lo figured

I don't look like a Nicki Minaj
how do I look?
I um well  I look just like me
but seems I can't find someone who'd
conquered my heart
and own it
take care of it as they should....


One  day I'll get tired of my self loathing
work out
and the World
will be impressed
but not
as much as ME!

*Copyright ©
Ayeshah K.C.L.N 1977-Present  
All right reserved
 Dec 2015 MOTV
Vernon Waring
Think of it as a bad dream...

You're sleeping soundly
on a Greyhound bus

Suddenly you're awakened
by cold water
creeping up your shoes
inching over your ankles

You jump up
only now it's too late

The door of the bus
is locked
from the outside

The windows are stuck and
the glass can't be shattered
no matter how hard you pound

The water is no longer gradual
It is swift, rushing upward
enclosing your body
past your waist
up to your chest
covering your neck

In seconds
there will be no place
left to breathe
just the rapid snakelike swirl
of ***** water

You're left submerged
Your eyes sealed shut
Your hands gnarled
in a deathlike grip...
You're hopelessly caught
in the rising, surging
pull of water
moving out of a river
onto the city streets
 Dec 2015 MOTV
r
Seed
 Dec 2015 MOTV
r
When the seed
of envy grows
into a big tree,
the fruit is bitter,
and the tea
from the bark
stains your soul
and your poetry.
#woof
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