Tonight,
I saw a black creature,
Move through the fields,
It's long black hair,
Like strands of fire whipping in the air,
No eyes, no mouth to be seen,
Oh it's just you old friend,
Lucifer beamed,
He sat on the edge of the old burnt tree,
Dead but no one had the heart to cut it down,
His voice tumbled out without a shout but it echoed," today's your day, are you gonna see the pearly gates"
I sniffled a laugh, "you use to call that place home"
He slyly replied, "see we are the same",
As his blackened slender finger stabbed in the direction of my house,
"Choose my darling angel" he belowed his glee noticeable,
The weight in my heart dropped to my hand,
Taurus Judge Revolver looked back at me,
I looked up but he was gone,
The wind picked up,
Singing a sad song,
"**** yourself, **** Yourself, be free"
I lifted the gun to my gaze,
I could feel the cold barrel against my cold ear,
I screamed," Make it stop"
Boom,
All was still,
She was finally as they say,
Free spirited

If they let you into heaven, I'd rather go to hell

The sky cracked open,
And a voice screamed God I can't do this,
I hate you,
YOU BREED THESE MONSTERS YOU LET THEM LIVE WHILE THESE CHILDREN ARE DYING THE WORDS WITHOUT SUFFERING THERE IS NO COMPASSION RING THROUGH MY HEAD THEY NO LONGER HOLD ANY MEANING TO ME IM JUST A ROBOT A SLAVE TO MY OWN NOT UNDERSTANDING A FATHER DOESNT SIT IDLE WHILE HOS CHILDREN ARE MAIMED GOD WHERE ARE YOU I CANT SEE YOU ANYMORE YOUR LOVE USE TO BE LIKE A WAVE NOW IM STUCK HERE ON THE SHORE DRY SAND BETWEEN MY TOES THEY SAY THE TIDE WILL NEVER REACH ME BECAUSE I REFUSE TO SWIM I SAY ILL ATTRACT THE SHARKS WITH ALL THESE WOUNDS IM HOLDING IN

I have a bad habit of falling for Gamblers,
Cause they believe in chance

If you really knew me,
You'd know I crave to go home,
The Dead Sea calls my name everynight,
My toes sunk into it's heaing waters,
You'd know I drink a Mocha Coconut frappe every other day, with one Reese cup,
So I don't lose my soul,
I've read Iron Fey for a record of 40 times not counting the first time,
Tom Petty is my spirit animal
I'm never in one place,
And I'll never stay,
You can't have me

Loves a fragile thing he said
You're my bestfriend she said
Months go by,
Seasons pass,
I devote my life to you,
All you want is my ***,
You called me after each class,
Telling me how much you loved me,
How you couldn't wait till you got home,
Home,
You said I was your home,
Your only place to go,
The girl of his dreams,
Beyond of beauty queen,
I held onto those words,
Hoping the world has changed,
Praying this man wouldn't play that game,
You started drinking more often than not,
Got high with friends,
Then you forgot,
Forgot about me, myself and I,
That a whole world exsisted out of reach in your intoxicated form,
I forgave & and forgived for months,
We'd fight after you'd leave the party,
Your hands finding my lower back,
Your thumbs pressing into my hips,
The stain of alcohol on your breath,
You'd lean your forehead into mine,
Whispering darling everything's gonna be fine,
I believed,
Your sister said she loved me,
You transferred to a school in New York,
My lover the archeologist,
Spending his days digging up old dead stuff,
But he never found our love on his escapades,
We video chatted everyday,
I didn't have the money to drive that far,
Your parents had your car,
The distance started growing,
More than the miles between us,
The fire we had now I dull roar,
You supriesed me at the movies,
But all you did was bring hell,
All I wanted was a hand to hold,
A chest to lay on,
All you wanted was a breast to *****,
And a hand to feel me up with,
Your hand slithered its serpenty hand,
Down my floral shirt,
Found its way to my ******,
Making it hurt,
I thought I wanted this,
I THOUGHT I WANTED THIS,
My heart began to race,
As your hand found the lace,
Hugging my hips,
I excused myself to the bathroom,
I haven't seen you since,
I thought I wanted this sexually atmosphere,
I thought this was the love all girls wanted,
*** is lovely,
When your not a young naive stupid little girl

20 pounds less than last month, I guess things do work out

For those in plastic houses,
Clear and Empty always cracking,
Lacking the passion of a true home,
Captivating the emptiness,
Suit and tie life just ain't for me,
The snow so cold by itself,
But build a home in the misery,
It'll keep you nice and warm,
Shelter you from the sun,
I keep my thoughts in my igloo walls,
I decorate my walls,
With all my problematic things,
Home, home, home

I'm not exotic,
Nor well refined,

Stop picking up two chairs,
When you can only carry one

He said " I hear your cry above the ocean"
And like the ocean his love overcame me,
I sat there weeping,
Praying God set me free,

I laughed,
Handing him the bottle of *****,
"Here's your liberator"

Front seat drivers talk ****,
Cause they're hip,
They talk in hushed voices but their opinions are loud.
I got no respect for you,
You make my head hurt,

He laughed,
His bright green eyes lighting up,
His choppy messy hair,
Flying up as he tilted his head back,
Staring at the ceiling,
He looked back sad,
Whispering," maybe you could've loved yourself"

Self portraits & honesty are my favorite,
I fall in love with them everyday,
To see a person as they see themselves,
Crafted by their own hands,
Then add honesty,
Do they really see themselves with that high a cheekbone,
That crooked a smile?
Always a mystery no matter how much honesty,
I fell in love at an Art Gallerie,
No one told me not to

Trees are often more solum than humans,
Their roots deep within the earth,
Yet they leave with the sudden breeze,
Nothing can make them stay,
They bend, but not break,
Are not swayed by the human race,
Trees are my elders,
Mother,
Father,
Brother,
They see the world through different eyes,
Look,
I use to dance for them,
Bare feet on solid ground,
The wind the only instrument,
Me and the Tree's only sound,
We'd have great times,
Until you chopped them down,
Mother,
Father,
Brother,
No where to be found,
You gave me this wasteland full of useless things,
When I walk across the concrete,
I feel their hallow screams,
Buried beneath the pavement a couple feet down,
Your wonderland of useless things,
In this pointless town,
The wind still calls for its lovers,
No longer intertwined at night,
He bounces off buildings ,
Frightening little kids,
There's no such thing as love,
Just axes and fire

I met some bad bad friends,
But we have great fun,
No regrets,
I can't remember the rest,
I started smoking,
I started drinking,
The LSD kicked in,
I met some bad bad friends

I'm not drunk enough for your garbage,
I'm goin home.
Ten thousand steps,
Hup hup hup

Double ***** on the rocks,
Double the ***** hold the rocks.

I don't really do this, but I cannot sleep, I really need someone to talk to? Comment and I'll message you.

I've held the hands of the homeless,
I've hugged the daughters of the motherless,
I've spoken to the deaf,
I could never be satisfied with a nine to five,
This is my life

My pink raincoat,
Reminds me of a shield,
From the world,

I can't stand you,
Like drift wood afloat in the ocean,
Forever drowning,
Never good enough,
Getting beat until I'm "perfect"
You say it's respect,
But you've got none

My hands smell like smoke,
But I haven't used a ciggerate in three years,
My breathe smells like liquor,
But I haven't drank in ages,
Maybe I'm dreaming,
Maybe I'm dead,
Is this hell? Inside my head,
Maybe the LSD finally kicked in

I truly wish you the best,
Aka
Goodbye

Crouched down on the bathroom floor,
The moon overtaking his tear filled eyes,
His lips brushed against my ears,
You let them steal your light,
I said I'm sorry as i dropped the knife,
2:07
Step it up,
Or step out

IM SO DONE, I'm SICK AND TIRED.
YOU SAY YOUR GOD LOVES YOU
I HOPE HE DOESNT LOVE ME
BECAUSE IM NOT HORRIBLE LIKE YOU,
ILL PACK MY THINGS AND GO
BECAUSE I WILL NEVER LOOK YOU IN THE FACE, YOULL NEVER BE A FATHER FIGURE ONLY A FIGURE WRAPPED IN HIS ANGER.
I WONT FORGET THE HORRIBLE THINGS you've done.
I won't forgive you.
Ever.
Not in life,
Not in death,
MY HEART HASNT STOPPED BEATING OUT OF MY ALREADY BROKEN CHEST,
YOURE SO SICK YOURE SO SICK.
I HOPE YOU LOVE THE VIEW OF MY BACK.
ICANNOTSTANDYOU I HATE YOU MORE THAN THE WORDS IVE CARVED ON MY BODY.
THE AFFECT YOUVE PUT ON ME IS LIFE LONG.
MEN WILL NEVER BE TRUSTED IN MY EYES.
THE LAST THING YOU SAID TO ME WAS GOOD LUCK FINISHING THAT. AS YOU TORE MY PAINTING IN TWO. YOURE LOVELESS. Disgrace. I'm going away, I'm going away.

doux rire ,
derrière bouche basse,
ayant déjà été dit de se taire ,
depuis trop longtemps ,
le rire est la médecine,
pour les âmes brisées,
theres quelque chose de beau dans la façon dont vous jetez votre tête en arrière,
oubliant la clavicule cassée ,
et le cœur déchiré en trois,
je oublie trop ,
simplement vous regarder ,
me regarder .

Wrap me in your arms,
Grace,
If His love is an ocean,
We're all drownding

It's crazy, how no one understands death,
But the way those white tulips lean up,
Reaching,
To the sun,
Away from the ceider casket,
That contrast is beautiful,
And death makes sense

No man,
Tells you his life tale over a cup of tea,
And a good solid book,
Or a beautiful painting,
It comes out,
As he's lacing his boots up at 6am,
Hickeys and bite marks on his left shoulder,
His cologne still fresh on the mangled sheets,
He forgets your name a couple times,
As he's babbling about his past,
About the time,
His momma dropped him off on the first day of middle school,
And never came back,
Packed her **** and left,
Headed west he said he believed,
Leaning back against the pillows,
Letting go of the built up air in my lungs,
I closed my eyes,
As he whispered thanks for the fun dear,

Lastly but not leastly,
I've found a home within a home,
I planted myself here,
Without any permission,
Butting in with no invite,
So much relief I've found in this program,
I've fallen in and out of love with myself,
I found words I never knew existed inside me,
Content now with my goodbye,
They say I have to grow up,
This place distracts me from the now,
Even though the now,
Is a place I never wanna go to,
Probably filled with bright lights and more responsibilitys,
Inhabited with people I never wanted to meet,
The smells probably sour,
She said from a fence to a leash,
But the probability is a chain,
I'll come back,
When I'm done being grown up,
If any of you are still here,
Outty five thousand,
Keep it real ya hear?

uneven, steps,
Smack against the unpaved road way,
Leaving the screaming house,
On that empty hill behind,
I sit down beside the dead deer,
We have so much incommon,
No family or friends,
We were left for dead,
We'll never open our eyes again and see the world,
As beautiful,
My finger tips carress the roughly fine fur against his jaw,
My lips meet his forehead,
A gentle goodnight kiss,
Dandelions & Black-eyed Susans,
I wrap and tangle evenly,
Madly, through his antlers,
My cheeks still flush with the escape,
My eye still bruised,
Wasn't a quick enough get away,
My emotions vast and empty,
Like this graveyard of a fields,
My hands grab the last flower,
Plucking it from the earth,
From its home,
No one was there to speak up for it,
Just like me,
I fell in love with nature,
I realized how cruel it really can be,
Just like them,
Just like me,
Just like you,

I'm ugly beautful

They say jealousy turned her green,
Ugly and unusable,
She snubs her nose at the world,
Like the wicked witch she is,
I say jealousy only added fuel to the fire,
Of a young broken heart,
She caught her lover of four years cheating,
In bed with another dart,
Those sheets contaminated with the sins of her beloved, that room only echoes his desire for another,
Not she,
The house reflecting loneliness,
She wasn't good enough,
Jealousy didn't turn her green,
The world did,
The tiny world she called her own,
Thought her own,
Two green eyes,
Warm arms,
And a steadfast laugh,
He turned her green,
When she use to be red,
He died shortly after,
No one quite knows why ;)

Slowly sinking thinking over bearing this heartached contraption masking every detail of pain he said I hope your heart rots I just kept on swinging bringing back memories of me and you long talks and lyrics were the glue between us two were not kids though no not anymore i like the ocean it's beautiful but violent like me he use to say that too but that ship has sailed I think I sunk it floating to the bottom of the sea this house of short phrases and empty promises use to be a home for you and me but you forgot what friendship was in the midst of intimacy being edgy ***** red carpet bleeds honesty so bold it can't hold any other color than its own I stared at it for a while your mom turned and screamed I haven't seen you in a while I thought she was talking about you but I think she meant me although no one knows you anymore she pulled me into her arms like I was leaving God I wish id left Right isn't anything you ever comprehended you tried to mend my broken soul by pulling it a part and patching it up with the bad in you it's funny though I still see your eyes and I still lose my breath my world stops but yours ended im still in love with you you won't fade away I promise at least not from my mind

The world jeered at her,
"Come down from your tower"
But I'm no princess, I've built a castle in the sky,
Full of my thoughts,
Everything's been empty for a while,
She said boys will want to go to war for you,
I smiled,
And said " peace."

If I sing louder than, the barking at my heels, I'll make it.

I hope someone falls in love with you;
I hope,
They love you in the morning,
Grumpy and tired,
Make up still under your eyes,
Cause you've fallen asleep reading again,
They love you in the afternoon,
Pjs and messy updues,
Miss matched socks,
You never cared anyway,
They love you at night,
When you cave in on yourself,
That cup of coffee & a couple pills of Celexa,
Didn't quite work,
They LOVE you in the middle of the night,
When you toss and turn,
Like your sorrow is bigger than the ocean,
I hope & and I pray, that they love you.
I wanna know that love.

God has shaken into me, a new foundation,
Negativity, you may weep at my side,
But you can no longer touch me,
Tear me to pieces,
But my soul is clean,
I haven't known this love

Poetry is raw to me,
Not packaged pretty,
With big words,
And abbreviations,
But misshaped,
Tangled,
And broken bits,
Of us humans,
Crammed into the folds of our hearts,
Pumping through our veins,
Leaving like an army from our mouth,
Fleeing, into the oblivion.
To me poetry is raw,

This morning in the shower,
My tears hotter than the water,
Beating on my bare back,
Sliding down my legs,
To form pools at my feet,
I miss you,
This afternoon in the shower,
Leaning against the cold wall,
Finding anything to keep me stable,
Everything a blur, I'm getting swept away,
I miss you,
After work in the shower,
Sobs racked my body,
I can't keep it in anymore,
I smashed my fist into the tiles,
All it did was echo,
Back into my brain,
To bury itself deeper,
So Id never forget,
FOR THE FOURTH TIME TODAY IN THE SHOWER, I CRIED AND THE TEARS ROLLED,THE DIZINESS CAME BACK TEN TIMES WORSE,  MY MOURNING COULD BE HEARD FROM DOWN THE HALL, MY FIST BRUISED AND ******, BUT THE FOURTH TIME I SCRUBBED, I SCRAPED EVERY FOUL WORD OFF MY BODY, EVERY SCARR AND EVERY EMPTY APOLOGY DOWN THE DRAIN, I SCREAMED UNTIL GOD PUT HEADPHONES IN, THATS WHAT HE USUALLY DOES WHEN IM CRYING, THE FOURTH TIME MAYBE NOT THE LAST TIME,

Tonight I wanted to die,
You'll never know,
The shower will never forget,
I cried my sadness into the foundation of its very existence,
They still say,
It sounds like weeping,
When the waters running.

I wanna be,
Loved like,
The keyboard,
Is carressed,
In The Druids Prayer,
By Michele McLaughlin,
I can dream,

I want him, but we're not right.

Heavens mercy seat,
Is pretty far from me,
I'm breaking down,
I'm defeated

I wanna marry Robin Hood

Your ukulele,& me
Bestest of friends,
Years full of summers,
Months full of just us,
It lasted too long,
It got too serious,
We found intimacy,
In more than the sheets,
Of music between us,
The beach wasn't spent swimming in the ocean,
But drownding,
In our syrupy essence,
We got into s fight,
Over man ******,
You lost,
I left,
The tears stains,
Your true color bleed,
A bridge between us,
I get simple nods,
A cute compliment here and there,
I miss you,
I miss you,
I miss you,
I'm sorry about your bestfriend and me,
We went a little too far,

Next week is gonna be dangerous,
An adventure perhaps,
Maybe I won't live that long,
But I'll dance the whole way there.
Don't beleive me? Just watch.

Today a guy,
Tall an lankey,
Said,
You're out on a limb dear,
And you've handed everyone a saw,
I laughed, but he saw the tears

He shoved snow down my jacket,
Ripped my hair out in the process,
I screamed, laughed and yelled.
But I said it felt good, afterwards.