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 Dec 2014 Lm Bernal
Drifting Down
What's the point in wasting our time sulking in the bloodstained past that will never be forgotten
Or the blood baths of mystery soaking into any bit of happiness that we hope will soon come
Happiness,
None of us are truly happy in our shameful skins that are so ferociously clawed at,
But to feel the need to survive
To stay alive to bear through the pain
To experience those once in a lifetime memories
Worthless,
If that's all there is to count on
The evil over shines any bit of earth's wonders,
But what's so wonderful when all you think about is the next disaster that will soon destroy you
Into the billions of pieces you so carefully put back together,
Pointless,
No need to witness life's miserable beauties
Or death's unawakening faults,
When all that's on your mind is the darkness that will soon overpower you in a matter of moments
Courage,
You waste your time wondering if this is what you want,
When you spend every waking moment for this dreadful hour,
Why wait any longer when death will forever be on your shoulders?
Understanding,
As days pass by,
No one will remember,
They'll be just like you
Envying the fact that the darkness that you're indulging  yourself into now,
Will soon become impeccable brightness that will never leave your side.
Spent my entire life contemplating whether or not to follow through with suicide and end the suffering of everyday or continue to drag out the misery life brings. In the end, evil wins, takes control, guides my path. Purgatory.
I've learned to hide my depression
so no one will know
learning to hide my agression
I can't let it show
swallow my pride
all to protect
who I am inside
I've got it down to a science
never told a soul
until my heart showed defiance
I fell for you
I let my guard down
but you weren't true
you've hurt me
I gave you everything
but it wasn't meant to be
and as I sit here all alone
I realize the truth really does hurt  
now my cover has been blown
You are just a prop in her life, Cody.
You are there to help her work through things.

That's great; one problem.
I am not a dishrag.

I do not serve as a free form of therapy.
I am not just a service to help girls learn about themselves.

I have feelings.
I get attached.
I want reciprocation.
I want affection.

Sometimes I'm the one who needs help.
Sometimes I am not just satisfied with knowing I helped.

I am not your valet.
I am not your counselor.
I am not your validation on demand.

I cannot even fathom why you think can just take.
It's because I can't give, Cody.
If you can't give, why do you think it's ok to take?

I will not always be ok.
I won't always get over it.
I won't just understand why you can't be there for me.

I am not just a rock to be your stability.
I am not just a blanket to give you comfort.

I am not a flipping dishrag.
anger. it boils.
 Dec 2014 Lm Bernal
Kambry Wilson
I said I hate you,
They said I didn't hate you,
I simply hated the idea of losing you.

Could that be true?
Could it be that small idea,
That keeps pulling me back to you.

I've been thinking,
Maybe they're right after all.
That in my head you're the only one I want.

But you hate me,
That's where the problem lies.
I wish you cared for me like I did for you.

So until you do,
I'll be here waiting.
I'd truly hate to lose you.
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