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You crashed in like a wave
out of the blue
and swept me completely,
Submerged in your loveliness
I shyly outgrew
my fear of sinking.
Spellbound by confetti of aquamarine,
I don’t know what to do.
Hero in the making,
You..
Unwittingly waltz me into spindrift.
I’ve had no time to write any words down
but the stars cry and squirm
beyond noxious smoke as thick as a quilt.
As we run out of space I need you to know
Out of all the flowers I grew
You were my favourite.
How many a line
Crossed how many a time
How familiar a shiver down my young spine.

How many a man.
How obscene an act.
How easy to place someone’s word before fact.

How sick and ferocious
How lewd and atrocious
I’m tethered too tightly to set things in motion.

Many a heart ache.
So much at stake.
I’m coming for you, make no mistake.
I would have moved mountains.
I would have drowned my light in your motionless fountains.
Burned alive your imposters.
And sacrificed angels for your dark twisted monsters.

But you made me believe
that the monster was me.
So I had to let go,
just to let the Beast free..
Sunsets I feel
tend to reveal
how enchanting is life
in its truest and real..
How do you see right through me,
clear glass -
tell me where do I hide
all these feelings,
the sparks?
Tell me how to stop this fire
turning me to ash,
because every time you come closer
I crumble to dust.
I found myself alone and astray
in drunk Chardonnay bliss,
after the games and the chase
and a complete strangers’ kiss,
hating myself for loudly admitting..
..that it’s you I incessantly miss.
i miss you so much
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