why are you sad?
Should I blame you?
I want to.
I wish so badly that I could point my finger
and truly believe myself when I
curse you for hurting me this way.
Should I blame God?
Why did you let this happen to me?
What the hell are you doing up there?
Why are you sad?
Should I blame destiny?
It was always supposed to end up like this.
HELP ME!
WHY AREN'T YOU HELPING ME?
And the reality that I am to blame for this,
reaches out it's icy cold hands and wraps them around my neck,
choking every last bit of air from my lungs.
WHY ARE YOU SAD?*
I can never escape my own mind.
I'm trapped here forever.
Suffocating.
slowly,

s u f f o c a t i n g

I take comfort
In the feel of an empty chair
I take pleasure
Knowing that no one is there
I am happy
With the silence that reigns supreme
I enjoy
Living life an empty dream

This is it
My silent sorrow
This is me
Alone yesterday, now and tomorrow
Simply life
A shallow hole, my heart beats hollow
A dying bird
*A ruined swallow

I always fantasized
about being strong
a hero
a force to be reckoned with
someone that could hold their own.

But now
all i want
is to make it through the day.

i'm still trying to figure out how to tell someone i love
that i don't want to exist anymore on this earth
how are you supposed to say that
killing yourself sounds like a better option than suffering through life with half a mind

i think about what people would do if i were to die
would they cry?
would they pretend they were my friend and wish they'd talked to me longer?
i don't think feigning relationships is such a good way to say goodbye
but hell
at least i'd be known to have a lot of friends

it makes me sad to think that my body has gotten so tired
that i fall asleep in my classes when i used to be the only one awake
it's almost like i'm 80 years old on the inside and my heart is failing with my lungs
and i'm 16 on the outside with bags the shades of night
i'm peppered with bruises the colour of magenta but i find they bring me comfort
it lets me know i'm not the only thing breaking

my veins are too

it's kind of one of those nights.
you know.
the one that makes you want to crash your car on the highway.

it's one of those nights.
where your phone is full of people.
but nobody is home.

and the only people you really want to talk to,
are the ones who decided you're no longer worth their time.
so out with a bang you go, my dear.

She is the beginning
As well as the end
The best part of the middle
Then start over again

The sweet part of the taste
On the tip of your tongue
The wisdom of old
The giggle of young

She is the breeze
That blows in the Spring
The long distance call
That brings you close with the ring

The moment you hear
Someone say yes
She is the mystery
That hides in the guess

She is the hope
That you hold onto
The talk of the town
The brand in the new

The little crease
At the edge of the smile
She's the bees knees
The answer to why

She is all this and
She is all that
When it comes to it all
She's where it's all at

there are two types of sadness

there's the kind that i can't bare
so i watch friends
and listen to happy music
and find someone to talk to

then there's the other one
when you know you're sad
but you want to isolate yourself
and just
drown
in the pool of emotions
listen to sad music
read quotes about life
and
basically
just feel empty

you brought me to your island, so I burnt all my bridges. little did I know you were rowing away on your boat. now i'm stranded in your lies, with nothing but a scarred heart drowning in my own tears.

I can see you in the distance, smiling and laughing. I wonder how someone so cold can have the warmest smile, yet have a frozen conscience.

i struggle to swim away from this island of depression. Happiness just seems so close. a stones throw away. but sinking in a sea of emotions doesn't seem like such a good idea.

2 and 2 are 4.
4 and 4 are 8.

But what would happen
If the last 4 was late?

And how would it be
If one 2 was me?

Or if the first 4 was you
Divided by 2?