work.
always working so late.
i came home at 1:00 A.M.
i lived alone.
that was past tense.
he invited himself in,
and didnt listen when i said go away.
hes supposed to sleep on the couch,
but his shadow still lurks over my bed.

it had been only a nightmare, i told myself. but when i awoke he was still there. in the corner of my room.  he was not staring at me but the window, everything was pitch black. i looked out the glass and saw more. “they will hurt you” he said. “i will protect you.” i looked away from the window to him. “but for how long will you last?” i asked, “and how long will they be there?” he looked at me. his ****** eyes into mine, “eternity.” i wept silently as the banging on my door started. “honey, it’s mom! im home.” my mom called, as i got up to open the door, a force stopped me. i looked at him. “it’s them. not her.” he said. “don’t come near me.” i replied to the banging. “let me in, he’s mind tricked you, we’re all trying to save you!” she yelled back. his eyes weren’t ****** anymore and suddenly he was starting to look less humanized. “mom come get me!” i cried. until i opened the door and everyone was gone. i woke up. on the floor of the bathroom. leaving there, i saw my families dead bodies. blood everywhere. i saw him. “their blood is on your hands.” i looked down holding an axe.

i had always romanticized thought of homocide. but in which way would i  have done it? i couldn’t be caught. that wouldn’t be the perfect ******. I’ve lived with four, but after my mother had locked eyes with me, and picked up the shovel, there were only three. id pondered many ways, the easiest to dispatch of was two. all except of me. i could’ve speared the rest, you’d never be too vigilante. pulling the trigger was an option, but they’d find the bullet. arson, a creative solution. i waited ‘til sundown. gasoline, every inch of the house. i entered my mother’s room, taking two lighters, and a matchbox. i lit three flames on the match, and threw at the house along with the lighters. i left. without taking any belongings. i moved far far away. finally, ive committed the perfect ******.

i watched my husband pull into the driveway
he opened the door.
"long day at work?" i asked

"yes, but where are the kids?"he responded

"you need to rest, we don't have kids." i said, while cleaning up the remaining blood.

"I can't breathe." - George Flloyd

"I don't have a a gun, stop shooting!" -Michael Brown

"What are you following me for?" -Trayvon Martin

"...." -Jonathan Ferrell

"I love you too." -Sean Bell

Stop. Killing. Innocent. People.

It seems another world is pulling me in.
My mother had warned me not to return,
but how could I resist? It was so tempting.
It called me.
I pulled into that world.
My mind grew, exploring more wonders.
Of all of these wonders, only one stood out.
I saw hate.
Hate between one and anothers amount of melanin in the body in usage.
My mother warned me of the dangers, but so dangerous that they ****** one for what they can not control?


Stay safe, the future has much to behold and offer, choose wisely.

Her safe spot.
The porch.
It was 2 in the morning,
and her porch light was flickering.
She could hear the whispers,
but she whispered to herself,
"They can't get me, I'm safe."
She walked back in her house,
the moment the whispers stopped.
She was never seen again.
The Title they gave her.
"Porch light"
It was a legend she was known on for.
But no one ever knew what happened

I'll forget you.
I'll forget everything.
I'll forget my life.
I'll forget my friends.
I'll forget.

She forgot.

This was not a normal day.
Thus far, I have only reached a limit of..
12 yards from my house.
He was on the tree.
But he looked different.
I knew he loved colours,
But this colour had been the most important colour of all the ones he turned each week. He had not turned this colour yet.
He was purple.
This resembled his ambition, his wisdom, and his creativity.
This colour was his own.
He was not going to change.
This was going to be his colour forever.
I knew he would find himself.
The purple cardinal

It was Sunday.
Naturally she had gone into Church,
But none sat.
None stood.
None were present in the building with her.
The music played a peaceful melody,
Sad, but she had been inspired.
The music played until it was unbearable.
She burst out into tears.
She wept into the corner.

“What’s wrong?” They asked.

She woke up.

Monday, there is cold and darkness.
Tuesday, there is fire and flames.
Wednesday, there is a peaceful tone, and a massive wave.
Thursday, there is a life-consuming melody. A siren.
Friday, there is a old house, only few have noticed on the side of the road.
Saturday, there is a young girl in a garden, by the old house. Quietly humming.
Sunday, there is a young boy, he sits on the beach next to the garden, and watches the massive waves.

"I missed you" She said.

"I missed you too." He said.

"But finally, we've reached the same day." She replied.

"And finally. We'll never leave each other."

The garden fence seperated the ocean and the garden, but that did not stop the two. She reached over, exiting her own world, into his. They both listened to the peaceful siren together.

I looked out,
Into the abyss.
There were but a few trees.
Still remaining in the distance.
I reached out,
And looked again.
The night’s eyes stared right back at me.
There wasn’t much too see.
But a dim light in the distance.
As later had made itself present,
The dark had soon turned into day.
Cars on the highway made themselves
Bright.
And the tree near myself, only blocked by a thin barrier of glass,
Swayed back and forth from the wind.
I looked out too see a small bridge,
Which protected your feet from only a small puddle.
Autumn had shown through the winter,
Even though we had known the truth of the cold day.
The bird feeder was apart from everything else.
It was different because of the cardinal sitting on it,
The main colours had been sugar maple, and orange.
But this was the colour of a darkish-red.
He flew away and off he went.
Still inside my little vision of glas

Near and far.
Away and closer than you think.
You creep through the woods.
Not knowing yet a thing of where you are.
You are lost.
You find yourself sobbing.
"Hello"
You whisper in your own ear.
"Goodbye"
She whispers back.

A peaceful melody,
chimed through her ears.
She lifted her body,
and looked inside of herself.
"I am not but merely disappointed"
She whispered to someone,
yet of friendship.
She rang the chimes.
"Prepare a new body for her."
She told the someone,
"This one doesn't quite..fit."

As we rode our bikes,
through the fresh air,
along the beach,
through the woods,
through the fields,
but not everything has
a happy ending.
The fresh air soon becomes humid.
The beach becomes flooded.
The woods become filled with thorns.
The fields are perfect places for tornadoes.
Not everything has a bad ending.
The fresh air makes you breathe easy.
The beach has a beautiful sunset.
The forest has a wonderful breeze.
The field makes you feel so small and free.

When my hunger is no more.
And when all is numb,
when the snow below my feet is nothing more,
than mere ice.
My eyes close at once.
Everything is dark.
And soon, I am a pile of snow.

Have you not done what I have asked?
Have you not done what the world has asked?
Have you not done your calling?
The ever so bright future,
It makes you want to do those things,
those things of which we have asked.
So if you ever second guess It.
It will bring you pain, misery, and darkness.
Don't disobey It.

She lifted her head up high.
She looked up at the stars.
The star of which she once lifted up.
Lifted up within her own hands.
She got out of bed, grabbed the window,
opened it, and climbed out.
She climbed onto a star.
The nearest one.
Then she fell up.
She fell into the sky.
She was a shining ball of light.
Like the rest of them.

The wind pushes the trees.
The tree next to my window,
it seems to be angry.
It scares me because I cannot
sleep.
As I shut my window, nothing
changes. It still sounds the exact same.
I feel.. unsafe.

My senses tell me to ignore it,
because if I do I won't be scared anymore.




I just heard a dog bark as soon
as it blew faster...

She gave me her weapon,
As she fell to the ground.
She told me to use it wisely,
and not to be careless any longer.
I trusted her word, and picked myself up.
Tears ran down my cheeks but I held myself
together.
I couldn't grasp what I needed to do.
But as soon as she took her final breath,
it made me realize what I had to do.
I had to ****** him.
Him of which had murdered her.

Her lifeless body haunted me.
Every night I fell asleep I could feel her.
I could feel her watching me.

It comforted me some nights,
but others were disturbing.

One of these nights followed,
but I didn't feel safe,
nor disturbed.
I felt like she was right next to me.
I flip over on my bed.


Sarah.
Why are you back?

You're amazing.
You don't know it.
You think you're hurting people.
It hurts people when you think of those things.
You're like a cherry tree, you don't change.
You're like a blossom because you're beautiful.
You're like a cherry because of how sweet you are.
I'm so glad that you're my best friend.

For: HJ.

I haven't been here in three years.
Nothing has changed.
Nothing has moved.
My coffee, the one I drank so many years ago.
Still there.
Still frozen in place.
As I walk over to dump it into my sink.
It's frozen.
It doesn't move an inch.

To my Step-Dad

Oh how wonderful you are,
You don't ever go to the bar.
You scare off every leech,
and don't fill my mouth with bleach.
I'm very thankful you're in my life.
But how is it dealing with a very famous wife?
I wouldn't call you Bob,
Heavens, not even Rob!

(I love you so much!) :D

Roses Are Red
Violets Are Blue
Are you a monkey?
Cause you smell like Santa Clause

I
Like
Maca
Roni

Petals.
They remind me of how much time,
how much time we have left,
Petals being ripped from the flower,
like years being torn away from our lives
you need to live life to the fullest before the petals run out.
like she did.
everytime you sin.
is one of those petals being wasted.
like years being wasted.
that being said,
treat those petals with care.
like treating your years with care.

I see the crooked but empty look on your face,
As her words shout,
They go in one ear out the other.
I walk past seeing the crooked painting
As I enter this house I realized
This house is crooked
Along with our world

I am far away,
The fog is in my way,
Heading home,
In dismay.
I'm coming
From afar
Your  home
Waiting for my return
I am coming
Back home to you

The migraine in my head,
It fills my body with pain.
Coming from all sides of my head.
My migraine wont go away.
Please.
Help me.
My Migraine is...

Going
To
****
Me


Its evil causing my head to hurt.
Letting out all the bad thoughts
Negative is filling over the Positive.
Please.

I'm
Going
To
Die.

My head hurts
It burns.
With all these thoughts.
Clouding in my head.

In my head all I can think about is death,
Reaching out.
I see her hand
I'm hidden.
She cant find me she never will.
Because I am hidden
Hidden from my problems
Hidden from my LoveLife
Hidden from my everything
I am hidden from her.
She wants me dead
A knife in my head.
In my heart
I don't know what she's aiming for.
I hear her words in the back of my
HEAD
My arm is grabbed
Thrown to the wall.
She walks closer
As I fall.
Knife in her hand as I suspected.
A i m i n g f o r  m y h e a r t

Waking up to a knew morning
So many plans
So many places to go
So many things to do
So many ideas but what shall I do
It is only dawn
The sun is rising
Its beautfiul
I walk to the beach first
I sit on the shore the ocean water,
It comes up against my feet
And under me,
Dawn,
Dawn is the most beautiful time of day

Gone away, Deep into the forest.
With the mist surrounding my vision.
Blurry,
I can't see but I know,
Theres a man looking at me.
Knocked out.
I wake up,
Abadoned house.
Its dusty.
I get up.
The wood below my feet
It creeks.
I walk.
I walk till I see that man.
Hes sitting on a couch
With blood on his hand.
Scared,
I run for my life.
Footsteps,
Footsteps behind me.
They feel as if they are coming,
Coming in every direction.
I look behind me.
He has a knife.
I  think.
I shouldn't have gone away,
So far away.
From home.
Trip on a stick.
Fall on my face.
Knife to my head.
Dead.

In every public place
There will always be a croud.
Wether its a school
Wether its a town.
At the school,
Your bully comes up to you
You don't know what to do.
She asks.
"Can we be friends?"
In your mind your thinking
'We could go baking.'
Then you thought again.
Speak your mind you tell yourself
"You bullied me you see, Its hard to be, Your friend."

And the croud in town

You have a public speaking,
You stutter.
You hear someone mimicking.
In your mind you think
'Who does he think he is, Causing so much wiz?'
Speak your mind
"You over there! You be quiet you hear?!"

If you speak your mind, It cant always be good.
But sometimes, You gotta say what you think.

Often I get lost in my mind
Inside deep thoughts
The sound of the ocean
The water flowing on the beach,
Each thing I think
A new idea
How I will do something
But I always get lost in thinking too much
Deep. Deeper.
The deepest I can go.
Swallowing.
The bad ideas
Every time I see a new Idea in my brain
I get lost in every bitter thing.

Dont you wish
Every thought would go away
Every sign that you have mental problems
Every sign that your upset
It would all just disappear?
Don't you wish that someone
Someone close to you
Would comfort you without saying
"Its your fault!"
Wishes Wishes Wishes.
Someday your wishes might come true
We all feel down but it will get better
We might all not feel like it will
People like you
People like me
But it will
in the end
Poems are a wonderful way
to get your thoughts out
One simple word at a time.

Things don't make themselves
Words don't write themselves
Thats why we all have to put in a little more work
To make the world a better place
Gods words remind you
That everythings gonna be alright

When all I see is darkness,
Your my light,
When all I see is hate,
Your there to be my mum and love me,
I love you,
Your the one who went through the pain so I could be born,
I'm more than thankful,
So with this poem,
I hope you understand how much I love you
When I'm a teen,
I might act as rude as others do,
But no matter what others do..
I will never hate you,
Your amazing,
And ...
I'm weird,
So are you,
I love you...
but your always gonna be the crazy funny mum you are,
I'M A BANNANA
YOUR A BANNANA
WERE ALL BANNANAS
I HAVE NO GRAMMER

Every time I spend with you
Each second is like a dime
clashing on the ground
But I really don't have a rhyme
When its silence
Between me and you
What am I experiencing
Some kind of deja vu?
Burning in place
Each time I run its like a race
I don't wanna leave
But I want the silence to end.
Poem by me
You will see.

Silent Dream
Wash away
The silence
At the bay
Sun is setting
Watch me go
With every season
If I feel the snow
Or if I feel the breeze,
Of the cold spring,
Or if the sun shine's,
In the summer dream,
Or if I touch the dead leaves
On the old cherry tree,
If anything happens...
I'm still in this silent dream.

I can see what your feeling,
Old Friends,
They come and go,
Some stay,
Some don't
Everytime I look up,
Their gone,
Then a new one,
Pops up,
Only to be lost,
Some friends,
Make you solve their problems,
Some friends,
Help solve your problems while you help them in return,
Some friends
Never talk to you,
Some friends,
Are always there to follow.

Isn't it enough?

Pulling me into the dark hole,

I guess its just rough,

Living longer

Juster to suffer,

From things You don't see,

But can hurt you mentally,

I want to see,

Above that raincloud,

I want to be free,

From this depression that holds me,

You can laugh yell or cry,
When you cry
You have to dry your face..
So nobody can see
That girl hiding behind.
Each step is a race..
Fighting not to cry.
Only to fall apart
I know you..
Because I've gone through
The same depression..
You have.
Yet I'm pushing harder
Happiness reach the end
But then everything bends

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