Blue eyes, blonde hair, red lips, intense stare,
self doubt, dark soul, your eyes bore a hole,
hard kiss, quick ****, over fast, no luck,

leaving now, going home, so cold, so alone,
shiver shake earthquake, so unreal, so fake,
tears trickle down my face, so slow, quicken pace,
still there on the brink, another drug, another drink,
block you out, so numb, want to hide, want to run,

Far away, leave it all, the more i think, the more i fall,
Shut my mind, shut you out, feeling sick, full of doubt,
Too hard, you’re always there, look at you, try not to stare,
Fake smile, cold hello, nervous laugh, hard swallow,
little hope drains away, another moment, another day,

Time goes on, hope it heals, because I hate how it feels,
But for now, I crave your touch, I want you now, miss you so much.

******* it.

i am a sucker
for the word
"sweetheart".

and you, darling
you say it so pretty
and your laugh
sets mine off
perfectly...
and if anything is worth anything
is not a laugh that harmonizes with your own
something worth
going after?

you are too old for me
thirty three
is quite a long ways
from
twenty
but baby...
call me
sweetheart
one more time
and you can take me
to the bank.

I want to take 2am walks through towns so small,
that cops are sleeping instead of keeping watch,
and street lights glow only dimly because  no
respectable person would need their guidance at this hour.

I want to tell teachers that their textbooks make me tired,
challenge them to teach me every subject with the trunk of a stately oak tree.
One that has seen more than we could ever craft into notes or test questions,
and breathes out a life source healthier for us than the toxic tangents
lingering in this academic air space.

I want to take my romantic notions of life
and press them into the pages of a non-fiction book,
so that when you tell me I'm naive,
I can present you with the research
that keeps your cubicle heart pumping.

I want to cleanse your body of its lead paint logic,
and use my lips to tattoo all the natural beauty
you've missed behind classroom doors.

I want to show you the beauty of broken glass in small town alley ways.

Maybe tonight I'll forget
how to give you up
beneath the moon,
which is also you.

Did the sea ever chill your hands
like your spine,
watching me
behind a naked tree on a dead end street.

Is it a lie to surrender half the burden?
Hypnotized and paralyzed by a sky
afraid to cry
and rain.
Please, just fall from your knees
I swear
I can keep up the pain
and pretend to pull you closer.

The middle of the ocean could be three feet deep
and no one would know.
I could love you,
but I'll never part my lips.

Do you know why I never asked twice?
Maybe it was the little bit of sweat that forms by your temples
or the way you say goodnight
when it was already well into the morning.

Can you feel that when the lights are on?

Dance me a song dreck thinker.
Let the ocean wash away your thoughts of rain.
Understand scars are forever but so are diamonds.
And every night you'll dream again.
You'll never comprehend the dark  like the moon
Or the light like the sun.
Learn that only Monty python knows the meaning of life, and where the holy grail is.
So stop searching and just appreciate uncertainty.
Then sing me a dream because I'm tired of screamed night terrors.

Let’s do something illegal.
Close your eyes and make
believe we are 15.
Bills and rent. The law.
What is all that anyway?
Can we get so lost
on the beaten path
that there is nothing left
to do but find ourselves?

Let’s sneak into the stadium
with our shwag and make shift
pipe in hand. Then
make love
like we even know
what that means.

Baby make me feel
young and reckless.
Teach me how to be
punk rock, and
flip the bird to
our oppressors.

Remember when
the whole world was against us
and didn’t pretend to be with us?
Remember when
we used to know everything?
Remember when
we were young and reckless,
and had a love that only
the innocent can posses?
Remember when
we were 15?

Baby, let’s do something illegal.