I need one to feel better
I need one to not feel alone
I need one to stop acting dumb
I need one when I'm with you
I need one when I'm without you
I need one for many other reasons
And
I need one because I need you

Dekalb,
Where the soil demanded a sacrifice
Of the girl with the sunflower tattoo

Dekalb,
Where I left a lot of blood
Defending your honor

Rockford,
In ICU where I woke up with
Angels at the end of my hospital bed

Rockford,
Where I woke up
on the phone
with my best-friend's ex

Arlington Heights
Where we attempted
to find our lost minds together

Arlington Heights,
...it was kind of a funny story

Illinois,
I've given you all
and I'm still here *******.

There is something I need to tell you
My love for you has grew
And is still growing
I keep wanting to be with you
But I don't want to too close

The way things are going
I will never be with you
I keep thinking of what I should do
Because I can't be with you

I feel sad and lonely
Until you are here
I want to be able to call you "dear"
But you're with him

I don't want to hurt your love
Between you two
Even though deep down I do
Want to
Be with you

The other night I couldn't help but
ramble about the Cosmos and everything I seem to think about
when I see the world around me.
You were smiling on the camera
and all I could do was keep talking
and saying theories and smiling about
the Universe because the stars make me so very happy and so do you and
I honestly have no idea what will happen when I lose the both of my favorite things-- You and the Cosmos.

I'd make art that wasn't the equivalent of processed
microwave food, without the "gourmet" label.
Then again equal validity in creation is only debatable
if you're an ******* who believes any of this has meaning.
If you're taking yourself seriously,
you're going to get ****** up by
the **** end of this joke; Art is more than these
observable qualities of reality. It is beyond us.
However, everything we are is made of the stuff.
We are art. Life is art. Life is meaningless
Art is meaningless.
We are meaningless. You.
You are meaningless as well.
Roll on snare... None of this holds real validity.
Abuse of cymbal.
In this lifetime I want so many things that simply
will not happen. She says my "dreams" are floaty
although I know I won't live to see them.
Life flies by so fast it's a wonder we don't get
tickets. I want light that moves at 40mph
and scorches on impact. Explodes like fireworks.
It should glow; green or blue.
I'd use it to cook these dinners,
burn these notebooks,
**** these mother
******* guitars.

Too many people
Have lost the art of
Writing

And I'm not talking about
Texting or
Messaging or
Emailing

No.

I'm talking about
Grabbing a pen
And taking a paper
And pouring your soul
Through hard labor of fingers
And thoughts
And taking that piece
Of great effort
And sending it to someone
Who's holding your heart

I love him so
   It's killing me though