I
I SAW a staring ****** stand
Where holy Dionysus died,
And tear the heart out of his side.
And lay the heart upon her hand
And bear that beating heart away;
Of Magnus Annus at the spring,
As though God's death were but a play.
Another Troy must rise and set,
Another lineage feed the crow,
Another Argo's painted prow
Drive to a flashier bauble yet.
The Roman Empire stood appalled:
It dropped the reins of peace and war
When that fierce ****** and her Star
Out of the fabulous darkness called.
In pity for man's darkening thought
He walked that room and issued thence
In Galilean turbulence;
The Babylonian starlight brought
A fabulous, formless darkness in;
Odour of blood when Christ was slain
Made all platonic tolerance vain
And vain all Doric discipline.
Everything that man esteems
Endures a moment or a day.
Love's pleasure drives his love away,
The painter's brush consumes his dreams;
The herald's cry, the soldier's tread
Exhaust his glory and his might:
Whatever flames upon the night
Man's own resinous heart has fed.

The town does not exist
except where one black-haired tree slips
up like a drowned woman into the hot sky.
The town is silent. The night boils with eleven stars.
Oh starry starry night! This is how
I want to die.

It moves. They are all alive.
Even the moon bulges in its orange irons
to push children, like a god, from its eye.
The old unseen serpent swallows up the stars.
Oh starry starry night! This is how
I want to die:

into that rushing beast of the night,
****** up by that great dragon, to split
from my life with no flag,
no belly,
no cry.

I let them come and go
Taking what they need
I give them what they like
Men are too easy to please

Small talk flows
Before we cut to the chase
Ripping up grass
And keeping the same pace

He is a friend
And a lover for an hour
Sharing something so sweet
But we turn it sour

I let him come and go
To ease the pain
Making pleasure my companion
To keep me sane

We agree it is a one-time thing
And promise controlled hands
But we will be tempted again
While striving to withstand

You ran thinking it was with freedom
But really you just ran away from everyone who ever loved you
Cursing every hand that tried to pull you from the dark abyss
Ignoring every word that came to comfort you and give you light
You ran and you ran and you ran
Out of breath, stumbling, crying, gasping through the shards of your chest
Because you think, "Surely this pain is better than pausing to feel the emptiness."
But when you stop running, your brokenness will still be there
And you will be so far away from anyone who knew how to fix you