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him
i finally understand
   what all the sad songs are about
i finally get it
    that feeling that your beating heart
has been torn from your chest
the sick feeling
that constricts your efforts to breathe
the tears that will not stop
puffy red eyes and lips
the feeling of complete terror
that you have somehow
lost something beautiful and rare
that you have let him down
finding the desire of your heart
a direct connection - electric - maddening
and you know
this is exactly what i've always wanted
crazy c r a z y hope
gone in the blink of an eye
but i had to try for him
i had to
he was something worth fighting for
and i won't take down the drawing
and i don't want to forget
and i can cry to sad songs if i want to.
Happiness isn't at the table were you eat your dinner
But
At the Kitchen were the cook makes it
Because passion is drive
And food is an escape
 May 2014 Julie Butler
Jack
Why's he the main course
and I’m just the leftovers?
i rid my mind
of darkness and depth
and a feeling of joy
is all i have left
such a heavy love
at times, i choke
on the shape of
forgetting you
j.
such cracks feral tides
praise the loved hides
i am loving you
in this moment
in this moment
i am allowing myself to
be wholly consumed

your blonde hair captivates this willing mind
and i sink further than expected
in this investment
of my heart
i was your ageless phrase
an exhausting prelude to things you need to say
but i won't
devoured i am
devoured you were
scrimmage love
you pressed your body against me
for a time
and i undeniably became yours

you shattered your mind loving me
it was hard to reach
and still, i was undeniably yours

the efforts we make to stay in love
it will **** us, it will keep us warm
it will end what we knew we were
it will create what it was

loving you is muscle memory
and i want your muscle on me
i want your mouth in between
crossing our teeth
and you won't need to apologize for your future shortcomings
because i already know
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