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JaQuise Caldwell Nov 2014
I made it.
I’m here.
My inclination is satisfied.
I am welcomed by the fire ants
that now cloak the overgrown grass.
A smile greets me
from the daisies
planted by the Alabama sunshine itself.
A loved filled
“Welcome Back!”, is said
to me from far beyond,
from the fresh, sweet corn
in the rear near my uncle’s old
property line.
A sharp wind suddenly,
steals my lungs true love
and I am carried deep
into a memory I had hoped to keep.
This land, hidden by the red-dirt
road in the backwoods of Bay Minette is
my safe haven
when the world has gone to hell.
“This is why I came”, I say
to myself  before leaving.
This is where I escape the world
and I am free to live in memories.
JaQuise Caldwell Aug 2018
When you ask how much I love you
My voice seems to sink, seems to
Too easily find the trench in my heart where
Insecurities and incapabilities reside
Due not to lack of willful telling but
Due to lack of willful selling
... selling you warmth of "us"
... selling you the state of "love"

My love

Exists only where words do not
In a sacred space of give and take not time but
Space... ah, yes. Space.
Enough to fill the spaces of doubt in your mind
Enough to love your heart to love mine back in
Space that we create
That our effort designs so...

When you ask how much I love you
And my voice seems to sink
Close your eyes, kiss my lips.. feel the answer
In the place my heart beats skips
JaQuise Caldwell Nov 2014
With a rhythm so steady
almost a heartbeat in time.
A song speaks what
others shy away to say.

A wave of fire is transmitted: through
almost controversial tones.
An undeniable, unattainable, indescribable
force pulls two souls
together and
ultimately apart.

The maracas are the beating heart,
fierce, wild, and strong.
Sensuality explored with
every
plucked
string.

In the songs final sound
what will happen to the two
domesticated souls
on fire for the other
Will two make one? Or
once again come up short
of good and right and pure
for
passionate,
wrong,
unforgettable
and true.
JaQuise Caldwell Nov 2014
You make me feel like a toddler that's just discovered the bliss that comes shortly before great tragedy - the innocence and purity..... the naivety. Every breath a new experience entirely. You make me love you despite the plea of logic, rationality, and well-being because passion, nirvana, and love make a case that's hard to ignore - impossible to overrule and..... I hate you for it. You somehow always seem to journey to my souls hiding place and shine a light through the shadow I conveniently place my fears under and... you make me hate you for it.

But

I love you so much. Sometimes it hurts to breathe because the comparison I make in my mind of how much I love you surpasses that of my lungs which love the taste of oxygen.... and *sometimes.... I hate you for it.
Love never visits alone...
JaQuise Caldwell Nov 2014
Diminutive in frame and stature
defines him not, but instead enhances the
brilliance of his smile’s shine.
The golden flakes of honesty in his warm brown eyes
covey one vice that is captivation.
They hold hostage your most destructive thoughts
to instantaneously
replace them with the best; of
joy, contentment, and love-the best of him.

His high cheek bones define a mouth
so perfectly constructed.
They rise and fall like oceans’ waves with
every gentle gesture.

He thinks of love as a pool of chances
and illogically
he dives into the hurt he’s found himself in once
twice, no wait, three times.
But still, he never falters to give “chance”
just one more chance to prove he’s done what’s right.

Secondary comes his needs, in light of someone else’s.
The thoughts, “too tired” or “too busy” does nothing for him because
if someone needs help, you help them undoubtedly.
I  have seen the coat that once
cascaded on his back give warmth to one
who had no coat
or smile
or joy
or light.

And for that one he lowered his head
to ask God for a favor.
I met this guy, this “perfect” guy when innocence consumed me
and since that day we’ve been each other’s confidant and comforter.
My love towards him supersedes that of a friend or
the best of that.

The truest thing I know is that when everyone one else
disappears to the mundane norms of life,
he will be there with me to cut through
the silence with rolls of laughter.
At what? It does not matter.
Because when I’m with him and he’s with me
there is a “we” that is formed and that “we” is captivates me

An infinite truth is that I will never stop
loving this young man.
He keeps my heartbeat steady so I
must exclaim the best of
joy, contentment, and love-the best of him.
JaQuise Caldwell Feb 2015
My friends convince me that you're worth it.
Convince me that you deserve my
time, my
love, my
patience, my

PATIENCE is wearing thin.  
My clocks no longer showcase the wasted
time that your
sorry
***
excuses
now fill.

... I am convinced that you clearly don't deserve me.
JaQuise Caldwell Nov 2015
Why did I let you back in?
... to catapult your meek fictitious "feelings" of unrequited
love
towards the face still stained with pain,
clocked in disappointment and concealed with denial?
Deny the truth.
Accept the moment.
Let pass, through the gate of your once shielded heart,
the feeling of feelings I felt for your foolish, fickle, ***?
... to feel love
be
ripped
away...
again?
Have it tossed over my emotion's edge
lost
and only to be found in the emptiness....
the numbness
of the eternal recurrence.
You will always come back to me.
And even though I said that last time was
the last time that
I'd have to taint last time's  name but,
here...
we...
are.
Same space, different times, same motives.
And yet... I fall for you
again.

— The End —